November 26th, 2004 - 12:54AM

I have other Alaska pictures uploaded but I figured that those can wait since the aurora ones are just so much more interesting. Here we go.



November 26th, 2004 - 12:37AM

Holy cow, that was like one of the coolest light shows I've ever seen. I got to see ripples! and got red tinges on the green bands. I was inside the cafeteria when my dad rushes and shouted "It's outside" or something like that. I got my gear which was already setup and rushed out on the landing. I looked around and all I could see were clouds. Then I saw one long cloud start moving all funky and that's when I started taking pictures. I totally understand why Japanese people rate this as one of their top 10 things to do before they die. That's probably why there are so many Japanese people here too. Man, that was really awesome. Video didn't work out as well as the camera did but that's what I expected.



November 25th, 2004 - 11:17PM

Currently in Chena Hot Springs, Alaska waiting for the Aurora Borealis (Northern Lights) to come out (between 11PM and 4AM). I'm uploading pics. It's very pretty up here. Below is the update that I worked on yesterday.

The entrance to the International Underground Food Court at Bush and Kearny. Downstairs, they have Chinese, Mexican, Vietnamese, Japanese, Thai, and Filipino food. I think I've mentioned the place before, but I've never posted pics of it. I think Margaret is the only person who I've not gone here with. It's pretty popular with everyone.

Once of the reasons is the 2 large plasma televisions that they have on the wall showing CNN continuously. You can watch "Crossfire" if you get there around 1PM.

This dish is from the Chinese place. It has chicken, shrimp, and calamari in a slightly spicy sauce. GOod stuff. I recommend the Hang Zhou Fried Rice and the Combination Noodle Soup as well.

Scenes from Chris' Birthday Party. Here's a twist on having teppanyaki over at my place. We're eating on the ground! There's really just more space to eat in cause the last time we tried chairs and it just wasn't convenient. I'm cutting chicken using my Wusthoff super scissors. At the Korean Market, I bought 3 packs of marinated chicken and 1 big pack of beef short ribs, and 2 packs of shrimp. For veggies, I got mushrooms, bell peppers, and onions. Lori brought the cake. Margaret brought the broccoli and Neopolitan ice cream. Not as much left over as last time! :-D better calculations.

Still cutting...and talking on the phone. So it was Jasmine, Chris, Lori, Margaret, Lih-Chern, Nancy, and me.

The grill...mmmm...chicken...shrimp...broccoli, mushrooms, onions...bell peppers...all as one. I broiled the beef short ribs like last time except I timed it better.

I used the timer on this shot for the first time. Nancy looks like a deer in headlights caught eating one of the short ribs. Hahahaha. I've noticed that my Canon is better than the Sony in Macro and Wide-angle situations. Great for taking pics of food (close-up) and better in group picture situations. I've brought both cameras for the trip since the Sony will be better with long-exposure situations.

Everyone seemed stuffed (GREAT!!!). Here, Chris is seen playing Konkey Konga.

Lori gets in on the action

Jasmine too

I showed off Katamari Damacy. Everyone got a kick out of the intro movie. Man, this game was designed by a person high on drugs.

Chris' cake (which sounds like Christmas Keki "Christmas Cake", a term for older Japanese women are haven't gotten married yet)

Too many candles! Almost a fire hazard...I'm fine with 1 candle thank you very much. Chris took 2 puffs to put them all out. Poor showing...poor showing. Hahahaha

I had a sugar meltdown from all the sugar in this raspberry chocolate cake. Man, it was good but I just couldn't have it all. That combined with the awesome Neopolitan ice cream that Margaret brought made me all jumpy. Hehehe



November 24th, 2004 - 4:15PM

So in a 45 minutes, Lih-Chern is going to drive me to SFO to being my Artic "expedition" in Alaska. I'll get to Fairbanks at midnight (via Alaska Airlines 295 and 3) tonight and be back in SF Tuesday night at 8:04PM (via Alaska Airlines flight 88,82, and 386).

I should have internet access intermittently so I'll update as much as possible. As well as post Tuesday's pics of the Underground and Chris' birthday party.



November 22th, 2004 - 12:05AM

So here are the series of pics of the Big Game. Here are Jasmine and Kenji on the hill before it got all crowded and crazy. GOt there at around 11AM.

That's right...Tightwad Hill

View from the Hill...a tree partially obscured the other endzone.

Cal players in stretching formation

The Cal Band Cal Symbol

The Ceremonial "Running onto the field" which started the game.

Stands are packed

Jasmine! We've got Kenji's ear too. And I look abhorrantly fat for some reason.

Bringing out the Jack

Hoorah!!! It got PRETTY rowdy on the hill near the end. And I thought the student section was wild...the Hill is where the actions at. What with the Marijuana and everything being smoked. Della/Lori pretty much had to cover their mouths the entire time to avoid breathing everything in. There was even this guy who was all weird and drunk. He got up like 7-8 times during the game to get more brew. So annoying. The things they had on that hill was amazing. I saw a futon up there and 1 guy even brought a BBQ. My hero.

A&J 半牧园 !!! They have one in Cupertino!!! Ohhhhh, I love the small dishes there. I haven't been to the one in Irvine in a really long time so I'll just have to see how this one stacks up.

Stinky Tofu....awwwww, this was soooo good. I haven't had this in ages (didn't have the Stinky Tofu in China remember).

Beef Noodle Soup. David and I got a lot of flak for ordering this common entree but you know what...I looked around and I don't think I would have traded it for anything else I saw. It was different than other Beef Noodle Soups but I think its because of the extraordinary amount of fermented vegetables (sour vegetables) they put on top.

TSA Intense Eating

Bowling in Cupertino at the Homestead Lanes. The address is 20990 Homestead Road, Cupertino. Paid $15 to play from 10:30PM to 1:30AM.

Steve, Andrew, and Jeff, my fellow bowlers at my lane. I ended up being the worst at my lane. But out of 4 games, I bowled 100+ for 3 of them (best was 139) so it was definitely better than my usual performance. Allen bowled a 204 which is freakin incredible (4 strikes in a row).

Brian is looking for a strike

Skyline view from Berryessa. We all went here after bowling. I think I like the Merritt College view better.

Margaret and I went to this Thai Temple in Berkeley for their Sunday lunch. This Thai Chicken ($5) is incredibly awesome and amazingly enough, I think it's actually better than El Pollo Loco. Of course, since it's once a week, it can't compare with availability.

The Token Line...it's an interesting system where 1 token = 1 dollar. There must be some law or something that keeps us from paying for the food directly. Because I think this is the same system they use at the Buddhist Temple in LA for their vegetarian food line.

Making a Thai delicacy. Margaret said it was something with coconuts. Looked pretty good...unfortunately we became so full that we couldn't eat any desserts.

These are the tokens that they use.

3 choice non-vegetarian entree. Everything was really good. I think I ended up with beef. chicken, and pork. Some curry or other.

Afterwards, Margaret came over and we played tennis for almost 2 hours. It was a lot of fun playing tennis again. Got a pretty good workout, running back and forth. Then we went on a run around the marina area. Actually walked the stretch I love the most (view of the bay/sf/bridges). Then we did the jog/sprint thing that I always do on the way back. Tried REALLY sprinting full blast down the last 100m but I couldn't pull it out. Ah hopefully I day I'll get back in shape enough.

Went to Shabuway with Lih-Chern for dinner. Here's the freezer at Shabuway. Hmmmmm...Kobe beef.

Awwww Man....the plating at Shabuway is incredible. The guys have skills.

Flurry of activity at Shabuway. We talked to the owner about what the water was (specially made with seaweed) and also where his 2 new locations were going to be. Supposedly one will be near SF!!! We told him about Emeryville/Bay Street and about the opportunities there. SF is just a pain because of parking availability. He's still looking so it's always a possibility. Anyways, the shabu shabu was great as usual. Sigh...it was totally worth the wait/drive. We watched ESPN on all the lcd monitors on the wall until we were tired of the whole Artest/ONeal brawl. They showed the same video like 20 times. Only sporadically did they intersperse some football footage. It was pretty funny actually anticipating when they would show the video again.



November 20th, 2004 - 6:59PM

Cal WON!!!! 41-6. Rose Bowl here we come. First quarter was a little scary (10-3) esp for the people looking to beat the 21 pt spread. Man, Tightwad Hill was definitely an interesting experience. I'll have pictures up as soon as I can.



November 20th, 2004 - 9:32AM

See this sight on the way back home everyday. It's getting dark early now.

Pretty sunflowers that I got for the apartment.

Went to Boston Market on Monday with Lih-Chern for dinner. Dang, the last time I went to Boston Market was probably back in the 90s. It's seriously been that long. They had really good creamed spinach. Just like I remember.

On Tuesday, the Watergate Association had it's weekly movie showing. They showed "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" which I had seen before and liked. The second time through was a lot better though. Lih-Chern brought Stitch to the movie which I thought was really funny. I felt more emotionally and understood some of the conflict better than when I saw it in the theaters. There were many parts of the movie where I totally identified with esp the beach scene where Kate and Jim are sitting on some steps at the beach. They realize that this memory is about to disappear so they just end up sitting there enjoying the memory while it lasts. I guess one of the biggest points of the movie is that the good memories of a relationship are worth dealing with the bad memories of a relationship.

I finished Halo 2 a few days after Lih-Chern did, even though it was on co-op. Awesome game. I'm now switching back and forth between Halo 2 Multiplayer and collecting items in Katamari Damacy.

Went to Carl's Jr on Tuesday. Got my Double Western. Oh yeah...

I put in for 2 days off in addition to the 4 I'm getting for Thanksgiving for the Alaska trip. Need to prepare. My dad is going to be able to make it, it seems.

Had Korean at Koryo with Margaret on Wednesday. Margaret likes the Konnyaku stuff! Few people do. If Margaret pulls it off, I'm looking forward to going to Whistler and Peru! Hehehehe. Man, to look upon the ruins of Machu Picchu would be so awe inspiring. We had the chap chae and soon doo bu. :-D

Kim Cattrall is the Vulcan chick (Lieutenant Valeris) in Star Trek 6. Just had to share that. I NEVER would have made the connection had it not been on TV a couple of days ago.

I dreamnt about having an Ipod. I don't know what that means. It wasn't just an ordinary Ipod though, it was a special Ipod that could do super things. What the super things were I can't remember.

Nice tree with newly fallen leaves at Yerba Buena Gardens. Lih-Chern and I hung out a bit before heading to Davies to watch the Mendelssohn Violin Concerto. Lih-Chern had gone to Macy's Stila counter and had her makeup done (freakin amazing what a stylist can do in an hour) and got all dressed up while I was again dressed down for the event (I had dressed up every day prior!!! Aargh, such a dumbass).

Metreon Snowflakes

Davies Symphony Hall for the Mendelssohn Violin Concerto in E minor, Opus 64. Clip 1 of Music, Clip 2 of Music.

Tamaki Kawakubo was really amazing. She started off amazingly strong although not as loud as I would have liked. All the double stops and fast sections were played without hesitation. Really amazing. Too bad, we sat Center Terrace for this one. Should remember to get Side Terrace next time. On the way back, we stopped at Macy's, Lih-Chern mistook Oriental Massage for Genital Massage (snicker snicker) and I got to hold and look and fawn over the Apple Photo Ipod. It's pretty amazing but it does cost quite a few bones.

Had Korean again!!! with Lih-Chern this time though. Look at how the dishes are arranged. Ah good BBQ. Spicy Pork and Beef!

TSA Officer Elections on Friday. Next event is January 18th. Wonder if I'm going to be sent to San Antonio again. Hope it doesn't conflict with events again.

Chandelier at the Hilton in South San Francisco where my sister is staying. Cathy is up here with her quartet to play at a wedding.

Met up with them after they arrived and headed off to Little Italy. Had Dinner at Stinking Rose...got the medium cut and mussels...couldn't even finish the medium cut but that might have been because of the pizza slice I had at TSA. Hmm mmm good. It was a little mini CYOSC (Community Youth Orchestra of Southern California) reunion since I hadn't seen Corey and Cary together in years. That's Cary eyeing Corey's rabbit.

Made a fake ski ticket for Nancy to give away as a present. Pretty fun to do. I like the way it turned out.

Well today is the Big Game. Hopefully no upsets. Yahoo Pick'em has it pegged as 98% in favor of Cal. A bunch of us are going to Tightwad Hill for the first time to drink and "be there" for the Big Game. Afterwards, I'm going with some TSA'ers down to San Jose for some bowling from 10PM to 2AM. It's going to be sweet.



November 15th, 2004 - 9:50PM

Imagestation fixed its upload problem. I actually used its online chat app to see what was going on today. Glad its back...pictures ensue.

My mini "rock garden" in my office. Kudos if you know what the "rocks" actually are.

These next 4 are from Margaret's party. Margaret is holding the quesadillas that Chris (other Chris and not Christine/Chris) and I made. Some with just Monterey Jack cheese, others with chicken and steak which had already been made by Margaret. I loved the limes/garlic that the chicken were sauteed with.

Tried to get a cool long-exposure of Chris flipping the quesadillas but no luck with this camera. Not used to the timing of it yet. I was able to get a few good flips in as well. Nothing like Wendy's flipping at TSA/MYOTF but impressive for me.

Yummy stuff...mucho kudos to Margaret for being able to come up with all this stuff.

Margaret MADE this. Isn't the design on the top just crazy!!! It's like something off of the Food Network!

Oh snap! +7 kills. 9 medals. but kinda lame cause all of them were from sniping. Still a 50% hit percentage isn't bad at all.

Chris and Lori sat in front of these birds while eating lunch. I took pics and movies of the frenzy. This camera takes 640x480 movies (max 30 sec)...the quality of the video is really sweet.

Chris hadn't heard of Kangol before. Had him wear it Samuel L Jackson style...looks kinda good actually. FUnny but good.

Union Square is busy this time of year...Art Fairs...the Christmas tree is coming up...people are in a shopping mood.

The most pimp toaster you could ever get. It's like retro AND futuristic.

Hairy Arms on a Calvin Klein Model. When I showed Lih-Chern and Eric this pic at Macaroni Grill, I kinda didn't explain that it was actually a Calvin Klein poster that I took a picture of and not an actual model. Both of them looked really shocked and Eric went "Why was she there?" while Lih-Chern just had this expression on her face. It's not like I have anything really against it...I just thought they would have airbrushed this out along with everything else. Did not know that visible hair on a woman's arm was considered culturally ok in the US.

Eric drew pic of me at Macaroni Grill...it looks nothing like me but I found it somewhat amusing. And yes, those are booster rockets for legs.

Macaroni Grill goodness...those meatballs are great.

Eric's healthy Pork Chops. He substituted the mashed potatoes for spinach.

Birds along the path at Lake Merritt. I took a few pics while I was running so they were usually at a somewhat weird angle.

This cat was at Lake Merritt just minding its own business sitting next to the edge of the lake.

The lampposts that I used as mini-goals. Without them, I probably would have given up much sooner.

Almost to the end...

Digging into the Dim Sum...

Yummy Shao Mai

I didn't get any of these dishes the last time with Chu

Dan Ta Heaven

I've really been Wanting a pet for a while now. How great would it be to come back home and be greeted with a loving animal who just wants to hang around and play? Actually that probably excludes cats based on those criteria. If I had a dog like Meatball (my uncle's dog) at home, I'd just transfer all my love to the dog instead. Hahahaha. But then I think about poop and pee and then it doesn't seem like such a good idea at all. AIBOs are out of the question. I may love Sony products and I wouldn't turn down an AIBO but I'd never think that I could LOVE an AIBO. Whenever I slept over at my uncle's place, one of the best feelings were when PiPi or Meatball would sleep near me or on me. I don't mind being used as a bed. Waking up to dog breath wasn't that bad either. I think getting a fish/turtle/hermit crab are out too. I need affection damnit! :-D Are fish going to spin around an extra time cause I'm there? Nope...didn't think so.

So I promised weeks ago that I would put up the 2 wallpapers that I made while I was at San Antonio. One is of my fav restaurant in San Antonio, Paesanos, and the other is one of my fav spots in Jiuzhaigou, China. Both are done are widescreen aspect (1280 x 768) cause that's what my laptop uses. Hope you like them.

Just click on any of the images and you'll open a new window that is linked to my Wallpapers album on Imagestation. Use the acct: Jookguest passwd: guest to access the album. Once there, flip there to the image you want...click on the image to open up a new window that has the link "View Original Image" on it. Click that and you'll see the full-size image. Leave comments on the sidebar instead of Imagestation...I don't think I'm going to check that often.

Ipods and Ipods...everywhere I see are people with Ipods. Makes me almost want to get one. I see a lot of art students with one and wonder if I'd feel left out if I was an art student and didn't have one. Truth is, I've never had a MP3 player, I've had a lot of devices that play MP3s but not anything that was dedicated to just play music. I just kinda realized that my headphones leak sound to the outside and since I listen to music in the elevator, I wonder how many people I've forced to listen to Jay Chou. Hahahaha...at least I don't have gangsta rap on right?



November 15th, 2004 - 7:41AM

Made Korean Short Ribs a few days ago. Pretty good stuff. I didn't have to do anything to it really and it was pretty tasty.

Lih-Chern made rice which I combined with the Beef Drippings (an essential component of Yorkshire Pudding). It was really good too.

So I was watching this show on Spike where they basically re-dub this Japanese trivia show. Here they try to figure out how many water bottle rockets it takes to lift a guy off the ground. Starting with like 5 water bottles...eventually they setup this crazy apparatus to test a 100 water bottle configuration.

Up in the air!!!

Here's some interesting trivia...pluck an eyelash in one eye...only that eye will shed a tear

Something is wrong with my photo service so the pics will have to wait. Went to Margaret's house party on Friday. I brought an extra table and Coronas because it was a Mexican theme with Fajitas/Quesadillas/Tortillas. Lot of good food and fun. I even met a guy I knew back in middle school.

On Saturday, I headed into SF to hang out with Chris and Lori. First I was invited to be the DJ at their wedding, really cool, and then later Chris told me that I was going to be a groomsman, double cool! Went to Nordstrom, where I got my missing shirt studs (same style as my cufflinks...so cool that they sell it separately). Saw an amazing toaster and fawned over a meat slicer. As we were heading down to Haagen Dazs, who do we see but Lih-Chern walking the opposite way. Hahaha, talk about coincidence. After ice cream, Chris and Lori took off and I continued shopping with Lih-Chern. Eric was apartment hunting so he met up with us at Macy's afterwards. There was a HUGE crowd at Cheesecake Factory, so we all headed back to the East Bay where we went to Macaroni Grill instead. Got my usual satisfying Spaghetti and Meatballs. The meatballs are just like the Chinese dish "Lion's Head Stew"...really really good. That's a dish that I should try my hand at. Eric headed back to Danville and me and Lih-Chern ended up spending the rest of the night with Halo 2 even though we were supposed to go to Ruby Skye. Hahahaha

On Sunday, Lih-Chern and I went to Lake Merritt and jogged/ran/walked the entire 3 mile perimeter. It took me 35 minutes which made me somewhat sad since during my glory days, I could do 2 miles in 11-12 minutes. That was like 9 years ago so you're allowed a little change right? Seriously I was missing my usual markers (I like using sidewalk cracks to measure progress) until I realized that the lampposts could serve the same purpose. Towards the end, I was really clawing my way and pushing my self to keep on going and to not give up. I didn't even really have enough energy to do the jog->sprint->jog->sprint that I usually do on my 1 mile run. Need to work on the endurance thing. Took a shower afterwards and went to Dim SUm at Legendary Palace again. On Saturdays, there's not much people at 11AM (the time me and Eric went). On Sundays though the line starts earlier, cause when we got there at around 11AM, we ended up waiting about 10-15 minutes for our table. Got a lot of the usual favorites except we ended up picking up 2 servings of Dan Ta (total 8). Hahahaha, Lih-Chern loves the stuff. Afterwards, we went to check out the Napa Premium OUtlets (Della recommended it over Gilroy). Though they didn't have a lot of the shops that Gilroy does, it does have a J. Crew there. I ended up getting 2 dress shirts/1 v-nack/1 scarf. Almost got the Gryffindor colored scarf, but realized that almost none of my clothes would match it although I guess it would match dark jackets and the like.

Have a lot planned for this week.

I also got tickets to the Live 105 Not So Silent Night Concert on December 10th (day before my bday!). Eric and others will be there including Margaret and Dave. It's sold out already! Franz Ferdinand/Modest Mouse/Interpol will be there among others. Should be sweet. Looking forward to it.

I MAY be going to Alaska for Thanksgiving. I'm getting the 25th and 26th off so that's 4 days right there. Plus I have 2 days of PTO that I need to use before the end of the year. I already have enough for Christmas and everything. I wonder if it's going to be crazy flying on the 24th/25th to Alaska... probably I think. I'm already researching all the buses and stuff that I need to prepare for. At least it's still in the US, so I don't have to worry about language/money changing/visas. I'll probably just go to Fairbanks instead of staying in Anchorage although I think that it'll be a long stopover in either Seattle or Anchorage. My goal is to go to Denali and see the Northern Lights...no mountain climbing or anything crazy like that. Not even sure if I'm going to rent a car up there although it's almost the best idea esp if I see sights along the way from Fairbanks->Denali.

I'm still missing a hand to hold and long-lasting hugs. When I don't think about it, I guess it's alright. I guess I never had a problem with PDAs sooooooo not having them really sucks hard. I had a weird dream last night about hugging someone for like forever...I wonder if there are strange chemical imbalances brought upon by not having physical contact like that. I know that babies do better when they have physical contact early in their growth. Maybe it's similar with me. I guess I feel somewhat lost at times not having that. I don't consider myself a person who jumps into relationships just for the sake of having them, but I feel somewhat upset/lonely/bewildered not having that special someone who wonders how my day was or thinks about me often or will know just what I need when I'm not feeling that well. It was kinda hard seeing Chris and Lori together (not in a bad way just in a wistful/wishful way) so I go back to my own "What-Ifs" and "Why-Didn'ts" and "If-Onlys" and "How-Come's"...sigh...ever listen to Simple Plan's Addicted? That's how I felt a lot of time...

Addicted by Simple Plan 

I heard you're doing okay 
But I want you to know
I'm a dick
I'm addicted to you
I can't pretend I don't care
When you don't think about me
Do you think I deserve this?

I tried to make you happy but you left anyway

I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
BUt I want it and I need it 
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker

Since the day I met you 
And after all we've been through
I'm still a dick
I'm addicted to you
I think you know that it's true
I'd run a thousand miles to get you
Do you think I deserve this?

I tried to make you happy
I did all that I could
Just to keep you
But you left anyway

How long will I be waiting?
Until the end of time
I don't know why I'm still waiting
I can't make you mine

Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you



November 10th, 2004 - 10:41PM

Here's the line in front of the EB store on Powell St. in SF on Monday near midnight. Everyone was really excited about finally getting Halo 2. It was sprinkling a little bit but there were several hundred people there cause it stretched all the way down the block and down the corner around FCUK. I went to the Emeryville Gamestop afterwards and there were about 50 people there. What was nice was that there was a VIP line for people who had already paid for everything.

Front of the line...there was a camera crew and a lot of reporters. Since I was taking pictures, one guy from CNET News asked me who I worked for...hehehe

Halo 2 Box...it's finally in my hands. Overall impressions. Single player...tons of surprises...multi player....aweseom on Xbox Live...bad thing is that there are times where you can see the graphics load during the cutscenes. But that's it. A truly amazing game.



November 7th, 2004 - 11:31PM

So there are some damn sad songs to listen to...

Top of my list is two of Jay Chou's songs, "East Wind Breaks", "Orange Jasmine". Actually "Orange Jasmine" isn't supposed to be that sad but it comes out that way.

"The Reason" - Hoobastank

I'm not a perfect person 
There's many things I wish I didn't do 
But I continue learning 
I never meant to do those things to you 
And so I have to say before I go 
That I just want you to know 

I've found a reason for me 
To change who I used to be 
A reason to start over new 
and the reason is you 

I'm sorry that I hurt you 
It's something I must live with everyday 
And all the pain I put you through 
I wish that I could take it all away 
And be the one who catches all your tears 
Thats why i need you to hear 

I've found a resaon for me 
To change who I used to be 
A reason to start over new 
and the reason is You [x4] 

I'm not a perfect person 
I never meant to do those things to you 
And so I have to say before I go 
That I just want you to know 

I've found a reason for me 
To change who I used to be 
A reason to start over new 
and the reason is you 

I've found a reason to show 
A side of me you didn't know 
A reason for all that I do 
And the reason is you

"My Immortal" - Evanescence

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

[Chorus:]
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

[Chorus]

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

[Chorus]

Halo 2 is being released at midnight tonight. I don't feel as much excitement about it as I thought I would though. Probably because of the dampened spirit in the apartment.



November 7th, 2004 - 11:31PM

I've done morning runs for the last two days now. My first time out, I brought my camera with me. Took this using the fast shutter setting so no blurring while running. Hahahaha. Soon I'm going to have to find another place to run cause I've done this one quite a few times already. The run is about 2 miles. Lake Merritt is 3 miles so when my jog-run-sprint starts getting easy at 2 miles, 3 mile jogging should be no problem. I think. Hehehe

Went with Eric to dim sUm at Legendary Palace. It was sooooo crazy good. Afterwards, we went to see "The Incredibles" at Bay St. Yes, it was the second time for me. And I'm probably going to see it a third time because it's freakin good.

Heavenly Dan-Ta. Oh so flaky and oh so good. We sat near the kitchen so got all the freshly made stuff.

Go Chu!

Yummy Sushi from the Korean Market. Good for 2 meals.

So many odd things remind me of the past...."Dirty Dancing"...a scarf...golfing...even certain commercials. I guess this means that I can watch the rest of the seasons of a certain TV show that I've downloaded without waiting for anyone. I'll miss Scrabble even. Weird.

Going to the driving range was so fun...I got a basket and it lasted me almost 2 hrs. Pretty crazy. Pretty therapheutic driving those balls down the range.

Went to Everett & Jones with Lih-Chern for some good ol' fashioned ribs and brisket. It REALLY hit the spot. It was actually brought upon by this show I was watching on Food Network. Slabs and slabs of ribs. Mmm mmm good.

My sister plays Sims 2 on her laptop. Apparently this is me and her. She really did a spot on job with her 3D model but I think mind can do more work especially with the hair.

Here I am taking a virtual crap in Cathy's house. I must say it is very well appointed. Hehehe

Here's Cathy, her friend Miri, and Neo/Keanu Reeves. Who's the French Maid in the background? Apparently I made out with Miri while Cathy was watching which made her uncomfortable. Hahahaha, that's so hilarious.



November 6th, 2004 - 10:32AM

Saw this ad on the way to work. I've actually seen a fortune teller place near where I work so this map might actually work and there are quite a few banks around where I work as well. Pretty interesting ad.

Went Shabuway on Thursday with Lih-Chern, Jenny, and Jenny's friend Jim. If I'm ever going to start up a restaurant, it's going to be Shabu Shabu, I just know it.

Yummy vegetable plate. If I had this prepared for me everyday, this would be it. I love all this stuff...well maybe not the carrots.

So nice and clean....hmmm....I liked the fans at the top that would move back and forth.

Nice marblization! The guy that sat next to us had a TRIPOD!!! hahaha, he turned out to be a photographer doing a piece for Sunset Magazine (you can find them all over particular in supermarkets). He took so many pics, it was pretty funny since everyone makes fun of me for taking pictures of food.

Mmmm...steam and good food.

So me and Lih-Chern got 2 of the basic shabu shabu (11 or 12 oz...can't remember) and then "split" an extra 8oz order. I say "split" cause I actually ate most of the extra plate. And yes, that Asahi is mine. I got the smaller bottle though.

THE MACHINE. I need to get me one of those. I'm serious this time.

Afterwards, we went to a nearby bar (Sammy O'Leary's Pub). Played many rounds of Photo Hunt. The object of the game is to look at 2 pictures and find out 5 differences. Don't play the Babes one cause it's pornographic and incredibly distracting. It was funny cause Lih-Chern would be like,"Boob?" and then we'd all look there and someone would find a difference near there and someone would have to put there finger there as well. The worse part was that the pictures were probably taken in the 80s and all the people were really hit with an ugly stick. Anyways, that was plenty fun. We also played pool. The pool table was much smaller than regulation which made it so much easier for me to get shots in. I guess when you play regulation for so long, smaller tables seem like cheating to play on. Did pretty well getting crucial shots in even managed to pull out a win in Cutthroat, a game I usually have no luck in (last in group assignments...starting off with 3 balls...that kind of thing).

Aha....interesting picture. The owner was so nice cause he's using the bar as a tax writeoff for his other businesses. After 10PM, we started getting so many free drinks. That night besides the Asahi Draft, I had a Screwdriver, a Party in My Pu$$y, a Purple Hooter Shooter, and water. Had to drive you know? It was funny cause I loved the PiMP (hahaha) but didn't know what it was so I asked the cute bartender (that issue came up at one point as to whether or not she was cute or not...me and Jim said yes...but it seems Jenny and Lih-Chern couldn't see it) what it was...she was like totally embarrassed and leaned over and said in a low voice "It's a Party in My Pu$$y". I was like "Oh! Ok...thanks!" I'm sure she knew I wasn't just some jerk who wanted a laugh though cause she was still cool with me later. Ahhhh....so funny. The Purple Hooter Shooters are dangerous stuff though cause I seriously couldn't taste the alcohol...so much like Blue Balls.

Lih-Chern and Jenny and Jake in the background. Definitely an interesting night.

Pics from when I went to the Ferry Building Farmer's Market...

These mini-guavas were awesome. Margaret got Persimmons.

Sunflowers are so pretty.

Saw this when we were leaving "The Incredibles". I'm sure that it's actually supposed to be Spartacus.

Went to Barnes and Noble while waiting for CPK to have a table for us. Saw this interesting item...dangerous. Margaret's been to New Orleans but didn't get much exposure with this stuff...maybe it's my fanciful idea of what New Orleans is like...blame it on "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil"...but that's one of my places that I want to visit in the US. I think I got a taste in San Antonio with the Riverwalk.

Hmmm...my two favorite dishes...Jambalaya and Roast Duck Pizza. Margaret hadn't had the Jambalaya before but she said that it was good. Had one of the best/fun conversations I've had in a long while. We mainly talked about all the places we've been to and all the places we want to go to. Ahhh....I so love traveling. I almost went to Alaska last weekend. I know that I'm going to go sometime before February but not sure when. I have quite a few days of PTO/Comp now...but I'll need some for Christmas as well.



November 5th, 2004 - 2:19PM

To the people on subnet pltn13.pacbell.net, I'm incredibly sorry but that subnet is having difficulties pulling up content. I don't know what's going on, but it really shouldn't be a big deal. For some reason, this site tends to have complete blackouts of certain regions...it's very picky and choosy apparently.

Anyways, last night was CRAZYYYYYYYYY. I'm going to upload pictures and have a post later on. It's the Incredibles tonight!!! I decided to go to this instead of K-Con.....ach....sucks....but tonight should be "hella" fun anyways.

Come to think of it, if you're on that subnet I mentioned above, you probably can't see that message. Hmm...I could change that but oh whatever...



November 4th, 2004 - 8:55AM

It's amazing how people really do actually use my website to keep tabs on me. Very interesting.

Anyways, the whole election thing is over. Bush is President for another 4 years. I'd LOOOOVE for Cheney to try to run in 4 years. I'm thinking that it won't happen and it'll be the first time (during my lifetime) that the vice president hasn't been the contender for presidency. Nancy (at work Nancy) mentioned how funny that it just started getting dark and gloomy in the Bay Area...rained pretty heavily during the afternoon. After, a week or two of sunshine, it's a little odd. It's like everyone's gloominess caused this huge psychic EM wave and changed the weather. I had C-SPAN on at work to watch Kerry's speech and they had people calling in before it to fill up the time. Some people are so homophobic/stupid, it's scary. The stupidness went both ways but more on Bush's side because of the whole Christian religious fundamentalist right who HAD to say how they had God on their side and all kinds of things that made me angry. This woman from San Diego railed against her neighbour's gay flags and how there aren't heterosexual flags. Aargh...anyways, I'm not liberal with everything ...in fact, my conservative stance on the 3 strikes law makes me stand out in the Bay Area...I just found it funny how one guy phoned in saying he couldn't believe Kerry got the votes that he did...and I just wanted to tell him that besides the Saudis, noone around the WORLD really wanted Bush to remain president. Although, there was some dread of a change in President from us Taiwanese. My mom and my sister voted for Bush mainly I think on that basis alone. I have to admit that on that issue Kerry isn't as friendly to Taiwanese as Bush, however, when you get down to it, it's not financially good to have China annex Taiwan and do we think that the US will sit idly by if Taiwan is taken by force even with Kerry at the helm? I guess we'll never know.

Had lunch with Nancy (high school Nancy) at this little Italian place on 3rd and Bryant called Vino e Cuchina. Had this Rigatoni with Red Sauce/Mushrooms/ Sausages which was pretty good. Even got this pretty good dessert.

It's great that Nancy is still around for me to talk to especially with all the stuff that's gone on between us and to us. Anyways, we talked for quite a bit and I've got more to share! (surprise surprise) Two of the key things that I find myself missing most are hugs and holding hands. Everytime I think about those things, I get all torn up inside like nothing else...I CRAVE those things...I thought that I was just looking for activity partners but I have those. It's that extra stuff that I miss so much.

This dark weather got me pretty gloomy...it even started raining on the way back from lunch. Luckily, I had my laptop with me so I was in contact with the office the entire time. I had a infrastructure code release that got delayed so I had to check the servers on my way to lunch. That's what I love about a cellular connection. If I didn't have it, I couldn't have gone to lunch. Verizon supposedly has a better deal than Sprint though. Since they have $80 for unlimited and Sprint is $80 for 300MB/data transfer. I think corporate accounts with Sprint is unlimited but I'm going to have to ask the Sprint guy when he comes in.

Went to Benihana in Burlingame yesterday with Lih-Chern and Jenny. Had an Asahi Draft and I was pretty warm and jolly on the ride back. Jenny actually goes there EVERY weekend with her family. That's how Wai-Lin was with her family and Dim Sum. Hmm...I haven't talked to Wai-Lin for a while. Last time was what last month? Hmm...If I end up visiting LA, I'll need to see what she's up to (this time I'll drive). That would be really cool if I got together a regular Dim Sum group for Saturdays. Kind of like a family thing away from family.

The chef dude was pretty funny. I can't even remember the last time I went to Benihana (actually I had an aborted attempt with Leah once...too loud...and once with Adam in Japantown for All-You-Can-Eat sushi...I think I felt kinda sick that time) for actual teppan. So this was I think my first time seeing the "Choo Choo Train" which is a cone made with onion rings and water on the inside rising out of the cone as steam. Then he would turn the light on and off and push the thing around to make the "Choo Choo Train". Then it went to "Volcano" where he put Soy Sauce in it. Pretty freakin neat.

Here's what Lih-Chern got...it was seared tuna (whether it was Ahi or not...I can't tell)

Funny chef guy

The "Choo Choo Train"...eh some of the pics didn't come out the way I wanted it to...I'm still feeling this new camera out. Takes time I guess.

Tonight, we're going to a Shabu Shabu place in San Mateo. So that should be fun. Not all you can eat like Cafe Mums but probably/hopefully better quality.



November 3rd, 2004 - 10:48AM

Kerry is going to concede the election in about 20 min...you can watch it live on MSNBC or CSPAN.

I wonder how many people in the South/Midwest watched Fahrenheit 911. Oh well...I guess the Democrats lost this one due to a non-Southern candidate plus "too strong" on abortion/gay rights.



November 2nd, 2004 - 8:51PM

Uggh....Kerry needs to win Ohio or Florida to win. Bush needs to win both....but he's leading in both of them right now.

3 scenarios...

Bush - Kerry
264 - 274 (Kerry wins Ohio)
257 - 281 (Kerry wins Florida)
284 - 254 (Bush wins both)

Sigh...I didn't even see it as a possibility that Kerry winning both. I'm pinning my hopes on Ohio.

Edit...9:37PM...
mmm...the addition of Iowa to Kerry's states does little. Changes my numbers but not much.



November 2nd, 2004 - 1:20AM

We had window cleaners on the outside of our building. Here's what it looked like from inside my office. I love the shadows and everything. These guys were singing Spanish songs as they worked, it was pretty cool. It's so crazy working from such great heights but it's gotta be somewhat thrilling at the same time. Kinda like when you're on a rollercoaster except all you have are ropes keeping you from hurtling down to your death.

On Saturday, Chrissie/Chee was in town so Chee, Nancy/Nanny, and I went down to Gilroy to do some shopping. I hardly do much shopping, clothes-wise so this was kinda new. On the way, we stopped at Darda Seafood. I had the Lamb soup again, Nanny got chinese breakfast type food, and Chee got Beef Noodles. Headed down to the Gilroy Outlet Stores where I swear it was almost like speed-shopping. We hit a lot of shops and we still managed to get a whole car filled with bags. It was here that I made a few attempts at taking the place of Julia/Hoo but it just didn't work out. :-) I don't (skip)

I got a Kenneth Cole tie, a Coach wallet (my ol YSL one was falling apart at the seams), and work/dresspants from BR. Everything was on sale which made me feel better about the whole thing I guess. At least I needed every item that I got.

After about 3 hrs at Gilroy, we headed back to Emeryville. Afterwards, I headed off with Margaret and Salah to watch the 3D movie that the SF jazz festival put on. It's the 3D version of the "Creature from the Black Lagoon", a B-movie made in the black and white era of movies. The jazz festival ripped out the entire soundtrack and dialogue and replaced it with their own music and funny dialogue. Sometimes the soundtrack was too loud, but overall it was a fun experience. Della, who went to the same show except earlier, later said that she got a huge headache with the glasses and I started doing the geek thing, explaining that it was because the distance between her eyes was different from the distance between movie cameras that the movie was shot in, which caused the whole problem with focusing properly thus the headaches, but noone there seemed interested in my explanation...sigh...sometimes I wish Adam were here just so I'd have another person who knew what the hell I was talking about. At least our arguments were interesting. Gawd, that data mining one was sure long. The three people I can see having a mega-discussion with are Adam and Eric. It'd be like a round-table gloves-off WW3 kind of situation. Hahaha! Anyways, Dave had misplaced his tickets (I actually was in charge of the other 3 tickets which I was so scared about losing...and almost did) but luckily he made it in time for most of the plot points.

Salah and Dave...well maybe "Jazz Festival Program"-Man and Dave.

Hmmm...jello shots for Halloween. Same place, Eric hooked us all up with jello shots the last time. I got one for Salah and Margaret but I found out that Salah doesn't imbibe, and Margaret isn't a heavy drinker...hmm...a buncha lightweights all together. After going to a few bars, we headed back to the car to go to a house party in SF. Passed by a very romantic looking restaurant on Union St that looked very nice. So this house party was hosted by Margaret's Physical Therapy (PT) friends at UCSF. Coinincidentally, Margaret introduced me to one of her friends, Jenny, who both of us instantly recognized each other as having been acquaintences but couldn't place. After going through EVERYTHING (TSA/Unit 4/classes/I even considered Beta Alpha Psi, but that's business and she's a med student at UCSF so that couldn't have been), I asked if she had lived at Stern (yes)...in the new wing (yes)...and then I knew it had to be connected to Nancy somehow. Having been around the Foothill/Stern area long enough, we came to the correct linkage. She was Julie's good friend from Foothill who hung around Stern (only later did she live in Stern as a RA). Julie lived across the hall from Nancy so that's how we knew each other. Crazy and small world. All of us even went to dinner at one point to Foothill and still I couldn't immediately place it. I'm getting old. She did remember in the end what Nancy looked like...haha "petite" was the word she used. hehe

Day after that (Halloween), a bunch of us had Dim Sum at the Legendary Palace in Oakland Chinatown. It was almost all people from Niguel Hills Middle School except for Della and Jeff. That's me, Chee, Nanny, Della, and Margaret. I'm not actually shorter than Chee, I'm actually kneeling quite a bit down but apparently Chee has a similar photograph of us in High School at graduation. I'll need to see this pic to verify that.

Dim Sum was pretty good except people seemed to not eat as much as I expected. Ended up that me and Margaret went next doors and ate at VH Noodle House afterwards. They have a pretty good duck noodle soup except this time I forgot to ask for FUN noodles. Still it was pretty good. Thanks Margaret! And yes, it was better than the one at 99 Ranch.

Took this picture of Montgomery/Market St from Richard's office when I went back to CMR to change the door codes.

Spent Halloween at Club Mallard...or Club Lard as one sign would have you believe. Pretty interesting crowd but not too many college types from what I could tell.

Margaret, Jose, and Me. Margaret dressed up as a woman going to the races, Jose dressed up as an anti-Bush person, I dressed up as a fisherman. My costume started off Indiana Jones and then just went off from there.

Winners of the Costume Contest...Paris and Nicky Hilton...male of course.

Mr. Roboto was kinda neat. Anyways, the club was pretty neat, I got a Screwdriver (done right) and Margaret got a Sprite. Turns out she can't really drink either so her having that shot the night before was a big deal (had no idea). How far I have fallen, pushing drinks on people. Oh no! Hahahaha

Have you ever felt painfully misunderstood? That's how I feel around Leah now and it sucks because you would think that after all this time, things would be different but actually things haven't moved forward due to a few key things that I never fully accepted and kinda deceived myself about. Everything I say or do is construed as a negative action on my part. It's incredibly frustrating and quite debilitating. So I don't usually write about the tough stuff in my life, mainly because I'm much more introspective and don't usually share too much intimate details about myself on this website but I feel like I need to share something. There is a fine line between trying to work things out and hanging on to something. Unfortunately, I ignored all the warning signs and tried to make something out of nothing. I fooled myself into thinking that something was there and made many painful mistakes along the way. I'm not going to say that I was never at fault because I freely own up to the fact that I did do wrong but it seems to me that people can understand why I would react the way that I did. Thing is some people expect quick fixes (including me) which is entirely unreasonable. When two people have expectations that each other could never fix quickly, things can happen that will cause pain and misunderstanding and most importantly frustration. When these things come up, one has to decide whether to try to work things out or to just let it go. I'm not a "Let it go" person and I'm having a hard time dealing with that. I've always wanted to " Work things out" even if it really wasn't something that could be worked out. I've come to realize thought that there really is a point where "Working things out" stops working and you're just hanging on. One just has to know where there point is and I don't think I was really ever prepared for stuff like that. I thought and made her think that I was a total care provider when actually I wasn't up to the task. That's a huge revelation for me cause I always figured myself as being able to care a lot. The truth is I know almost for certain that I'm not ready for kids yet since I don't deal well with unconfident, emotional people. Before, I used to think, sure I'll be great with kids, but I should have added the proviso that I'd be great with good kids. I would be horrible with bad kids. And that's something I'm going to have to work out if I ever have kids. There are so many things that I've learned in the past 2 years about myself and my limits that I know that I have to be stronger for myself and not let my heart get in the way of my head as it tries to do. Again, at times it's ok, but not all the time. Know when you're at the extremes and see if you can get back to the middle. If you can't get back to the middle, and can't stand the extremes, then problems will happen and the longer you wait around, the more hurt you're going to be. Anyways, no more, I've revealed enough of my thoughts and I don't even know half of the people reading my site. I think I also hide my true feelings pretty darn well. I've done it for most of my life (had to you know to keep the hurt I was feeling away from school) and I'd say that quite a few people around me would be surprised to know just how much I do feel down even though I'm laughing and stuff. Kinda weird I know but it happens to a lot of people I can imagine. Revealing your inner feelings can be hard and painful, but around the right people (as I've found in the last few weeks), it can be incredibly therapeutic.

Also I've found that listening to Katamari Tamashii music as well as "Happy Face" by Destiny's Child gets me happy and optimistic and generally more fun to be around again. Shhh....don't tell anyone. heh heh