叫んでも聞こえないこの声

My glorious job part 2

Sometimes, I feel like a prostitute.

It goes a little something like this:

A resident decides on a time that's convenient when I (or my coworkers) are available, and an appointment is set up. I go over at the appointed time (on time, always on time because it's ever so important to be punctual), and we do our thing. We don't really need to know each other's names, and even if we do introduce ourselves it's oftentimes so ephemeral that we won't remember ten minutes later.

Sometimes we'll talk while we're doing it. Sometimes it's a fascinationg conversation, like when I talked for a half hour with a girl about various classical composers and which ones we liked for their style of composition. Sometimes it'll be empty chit chat on the classes they're taking or I'm taking and neither of us really cares but we try to fill the silence with a sound to stifle our individual discomforts.

When I'm done dancing my dance and they're done with theirs we part with a smile and a wave. Should we meet on campus we carefully avert our eyes and pretend to be engrossed in the particular cloud formations of the day (even if it's completely overcast) and walk on by, ignoring the other's existence. But they know and I know that there was a moment when we connected, we simply do not dare to voice the thought aloud lest its reality sink in upon us.

On the other hand, one of my apartmentmates who also did the job sees it as being a doctor. He's a much lighter fellow than me.

Posted by aoshi at September 8, 2004 05:44 PM