wealth, education, or good diet: pick two.

Posted on 2012년May월10일, Thursday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년05월10일, 목요일 아침: *sigh* i don’t know what to do because i’m so exhausted these days because of all the things i need to do around the house, and things aren’t really getting better.  this morning, i actually skipped crossfit because i was just so exhausted.  i slept in.  i slept in really late… i mean compared to my usual schedule.  i let ewan sleep in.  i slept in so much, yet i still feel exhausted.  the work around the house really never ends.  it’s horrible.  *sigh*  my whole body aches; and i feel discomfort everywhere, inside and out.  as i said, i wasn’t eating enough or sleeping enough.  i also wasn’t bathing enough.  well, i tried to feed myself better last night… at least i tried to feed myself more.  i slept more.  i also made sure to take a shower last night.  you see, these days, i often pass out on the floor of ewan’s room while singing him to sleep.  that’s been a trend for the past few weeks because i’m just so tired at night.  then, when i wake up, i go to bed; but i don’t shower because i’m scared i’ll wake the beautiful kaela hwang up, and then she’ll be really mad about that.  thus, i just go to bed without a shower.  then in the morning, i just haven’t had time to shower lately because i’m busy chasing ewan around, cooking, and cleaning.  on monday night, i purposely went to the 24 hour fitness super sport for two things: 1) to put ewan in kids club so that he could play and 2) to shower.  what am i going to do?  [a little later] it’s probably not just the amount of work i do around the house but probably also the amount of stress i’m given.  it’s really bad these days.  i need to make it through this summer.  i need to make it through this next several weeks.  i need to make it to the end of the month.  i need to make it to the end of the week.  i need to make it to the end of the day.  god, please help me.

[later] one thing specific thing, besides all the housework, that is stressing me out at least a little is the finances of sending ewan to preschool.  (i mentioned this before.)  it’s very expensive, but what can we do?  our biggest category of spending is food, hands down.  there is absolutely no competition.  our grocery and dining bills consistently kill us each month.  paying for our food so easily transports us from “living quite comfortably” to “barely scraping by.”  i would complain about this more if i weren’t so sold on it myself nowadays.  in the past, i could avoid blame; but now that i’m all sold on eating healthily. it’s also partly my fault.  organic produce, organic meats, wild seafood, gluten.free versions of baked goods; they are all expensive.  now that i’ve gone grain.free, i’m contributing to this financial catastrophe.  eating only meats and vegetables for meals is much more expensive than padding those meals with grains and starches.  sometimes this is most obvious when we dine out.  let’s say i remove the rice, noodles, or bread from a dish.  i end up not as full, so i sometimes order more grain.free food.  for example, there’s that time at 로렌스 플라자 lawrence plaza when ewan and i met up with shelton and cailley for lunch and we ordered a lunch order of 족발 jokbal and a tuna sashimi salad.  that looks like way more than enough food for a dad and a toddler son, but because it was all grain.free we were able to clean it off so easily.

anyway, yeah… spending on groceries and dining is killing us, but what can we do? should we dine out less and cook more?  since i need to do pretty much all of the cooking at home, that’s a tougher solution than it used to be.  my time is limited.  this is why so many single engineers would prefer to dine out (at low to moderately priced, casual joints) than cook.  time spent cooking doesn’t save money when you ought to be using that time to work and advance your career.  lately, since pretty much all the responsibility of feeding the family has fallen on me, i’ve been more likely to say, “let’s just go out.”  it’s bad, but i don’t feel i have much choice.

thus, to fix our budget so that ewan can go to preschool, we can try to curb our spending – as if i’m not already always trying to do that, or i can try to make more money.  after all, if i can get a couple of paid, wedding dj gigs each month; then that would definitely help, although i need to make sure i budget properly for paying my taxes on this income.

actually, all this talk of budget is not only for ewan’s preschool, but it is obviously also important for baby number two!  honestly, i know i don’t talk about baby number two enough, but it’s only because i’m so overburdened right now, as is; so it’s hard for me to look beyond the next few months.

although i insist that it’s not unbearable because god will pull me through, i must say that it’s not easy to be a full.time dad, a full.time engineer, and a more.than.part.time dj.  you know, there are many families where the dad is just left to go work and not expected to do so much at home.  then there are families in which the dad helps out a lot, but the mom has a good, solid job that contributes to the household income.  in some cases, the mom quit her job or scaled back on her job after having kids, but she used her 20s and 30s to take on a solid career that earned a decent savings.  i’m not in those kinds of situations, and honestly i don’t care that i’m not.  however, what i don’t like is being compared to families and dads in that situation.  that is not a fair comparison!  [later] 오후: i don’t want to hear stuff like, ‘why can’t we take a europe trip too?’, ‘how come we can’t hire a full.time nanny?’, ‘how come i didn’t get expensive jewelry as a “push gift?”‘  what the heck?!  would you rather have a “push gift” or an involved husband and father?  ”push gifts” are for dads who hang out in the waiting room and pass out cigars once they hear the news!  … and then head back to the office after holding the baby once.

there’s a lot of nice things that our friends have that we can’t afford because we live an alternative lifestyle.  some people call it “crunchy,” some people call it “granola”; but neither of those terms make sense with my grain.free diet.  ”hippies?”  hippies aren’t necessarily healthy!  they are down with nature, but they also smoke a lot… of “things.”  ”bohemians,” “hipsters,” “beatniks…” none of those labels really fit.  an otherwise asian.american “yuppie” family that has an unusual attachment to natural food and alternative medicine…  that’s not common.  those two worlds just don’t easily fit together.

go ahead and take race out of the picture; remove the “asian.american” part of that label.  it’s still not the most common combination, although it’s a better fit.  i think the reason is the link between “asian.america” and “materialism.”  asian.american women and their prada, gucci, and louis vuitton bags.  asian.american men and their lexus roadsters, m3s, and porsches.  that’s quite a scene, isn’t it?  it’s probably worse in socal (all this stuff is), but it’s up here in the san francisco bay area too.  however, good health doesn’t fit into the materialistic dream. seriously, when i look around at the richest people as well as people who are simply richer than me; they do not eat more healthily than i do, never!  some might dabble in healthy food… they’ll buy some organics maybe try some low.carb options.  they definitely eat nicer and fancier foods than i do.  however, with the exception of hollywood celebrities that want to make a statement with their fad diets; most rich people feel fine that their secret to building up and maintaining wealth is sacrificing the little things, and healthier food is easily one of those little things which they feel can be skimped on.

sure, every financial scam guru will ask you to tell them the dream you wish to obtain through wealth; and you can tell them your dream is to be able to feed your family “fresh, organic, gluten.free meals all the time”; and they’ll of course respond with, “oh, that’s a nice dream.  that’s something different.  i like that.”  however, of course they’ll always aim to flatter you into buying into their ridiculous seminars on the laws of attraction or whatnot.  all the while, they don’t care about your health!  they didn’t get rich off of caring about your health; they got rich off of scamming people.  to them, it’s all about money; and they’ll always tell you that the secret is to tell yourself that it’s all about money.  …but is it?  i though it was about health.

every person with more money than i do knows that it’s a “simple fact” that building up wealth has everything to do with delayed gratification.  delayed gratification has little to do with paying more to eat healthier now to be healthier now and later.  however, delayed gratification and eating healthier intersect in the sense that if you hold off on eating certain “treat” foods, you’ll enjoy better health now and later.  those are two different things.  unfortunately, we simply have a broken system.  you can try to blame the american government or you can blame american corporations.  however it came to be, it simply isn’t cheap to eat healthier.  when you take healthy eating to the extreme, it simply gets worse.  recently on the “norcal crossfit fuel” nutrition blog, there was a post about eating paleo on a budget: “paleo on a budget,” posted on 2012년05월01일.  that’s one crowd i’m exposed to on a regular basis that does try to eat more healthily.

contrary to all the hype though, not all the people at my crossfit box (norcal crossfit) are “paleo” (on the paleolithic diet).  most are low carb people that restrict their intake of grains, starches, and sugar though.  they laugh at counting calories and using artificial sweeteners and with good reason, of course.  they are more about high protein than low fat.  although the general sentiment is to “eat real food,” some use whey protein shakes.  the room has sponsored advertising from a company called progenex.  it sounds like a pretty good whey protein powder mix, but it has sucralose.  the instructors have never flat out told us that we must be “paleo.”  our main instructor at the san josé location pat barber said that he’s on the “primal zone diet,” and does do dairy.

one strange phenomenon that i have noticed at our box is that many of the newcomers (or “newbies”) tend to be vegetarians of all things.  the die hard regulars are definitely not, but i have overheard quite a few conversations in which some new person (usually a woman) says tells an instructor that she (or he) is vegetarian.  then the instructor usually answers as a charismatic apologist for the high protein, low carb, real food movement by saying something like, “oh, okay.  yeah, i tried to be vegetarian for a while.  it’s good, but it’s very hard to get the protein you need and a lot of the minerals that you need too.”  the response is very respectful of beliefs and might even praise the environmental and animal rights implications but always gets down tot he nitty.gritty truth of the deficiencies of vegetarian diets.

you know, speaking of vegetarian diets… yeah, when i saw that many asian.american yuppies that i find myself around aren’t that focused on extremely healthy diets (such as the paleo diet or going gluten.free or grain.free), the most common way in which my friends in this circle will insist that they keep to a good diet is to say that they are vegetarian to some extent.  after all, many of my south indian friends are vegetarian.  however, i have noticed more of my “cjk” asian (chinese, japanese, korean, and taiwanese) friends have been declaring vegetarianism as of late.  that’s “nice,” but when i speak of this struggle between finances and healthy diets, i am not talking about vegetarianism by any means.  no, i am talking about eating organic food, eating probiotic food, eating gluten.free and grain.free food, eating natural and preservative.free food, eating grass.fed animals, eating game meats, eating wild seafood, etc., etc.  once you venture that far into the extremely healthy diets, you’ll know just how much they hit the wallets and bank accounts.  just eating vegetarian, just eating low fat, just eating low sugar, even just eating low carb… all that is a totally different animal and doesn’t apply.  well, there is one breed of vegetarian that counts: that is the raw food vegetarians.  i don’t think that all raw food people are vegetarians, but i bet that most are.  just as the media speaks of an “educated elite” (especially around election time), i am speaking of a nutritionally elite.  the diets i speak of are the harvards, mits, princetons, yales, and berkeleys of diets.

i have already stated that richer people do not eat more healthily.  at some point, my next question will be if better educated people eat more healthily.  i’m not sure.  i’ll have to think about that one.  do smarter people eat more healthily?  after all, many people try to say that people who eat more healthily are smarter.  that kind of statement upsets me because it resembles the logic of the pharisees that said that a diseased person lived a sinful life.  it couples health with morality.  can you get away with saying fat people are lazy?  can you say a kid was born with a deformation because one of his parents committed adultery?  can you say that high carb diets create adhd kids that misbehave in class?  the coupling of health and morality…

  • articles about health and diet:
    • “how to help your children maintain a healthy weight,” by alice g. walton, published in the atlantic on 2012년05월10일
      • “nothing should be restricted.  the ‘no cookie’ rules almost never work because i can guarantee you that children are finding the foods elsewhere.”
      • “one of the most effective methods for helping children lose weight is when the parents change their own habits. . .  your behavior will rub off on your child more than you may want to believe.”
      • for ewan, our aim isn’t weight loss but simply a healthy body.  if anything, i want him to be a very sturdy, well.built, little boy.  our friend ben said that our diet for ewan is like that of an mma (mixed martial arts) fighter.  i took that as a compliment.  i would love for ewan to grow up as strong as an mma fighter.
      • i totally agree with the quotes above.  i don’t see how we can have all these dietary rules for ewan and then not necessarily follow them ourselves.
      • i notice that ewan is developing very bad emotional complexes over food, especially the ostracisation over food.  already, he’s not allowed to eat the junk food that all his peers eat, all the cheerios, cookies, chips, goldfish, and desserts that he sees his friends eat.  i know that hurts his self.esteem because he feels like a second class citizen.  he wonders why he’s not allowed to eat the food that everyone else is eating.
      • i feel so bad when we even do that to him within the family!  i mean, obviously, he’s not allowed to drink coffee, wine, or bier; but if we’re eating a dish at a restaurant that has wheat in it but won’t let him eat it, then it’s just another time when he’s told he’s not allowed to eat what everyone else is eating, and that’s sad.
    • “why it matters that california teens eat less than their peers,” by allison aubrey, published on npr.org on 2012년05월10일
    • “‘gluten.free’: a diet fad or medical necessity?” by laura snyder, published on coastweekend.com on 2012년05월09일
  • articles about wealth and the super rich:
    • “secret fears of the super.rich,” by graeme wood, published in the atlantic back in 2012년04월
    • “american excess: a wall street trader tells all,” by philipp meyer, published in the independent way back on 월요일 monday, 2009년04월27일
      • the subtitle: “fine wines, lobster lunches, and million.dollar salaries — life as a wall street shark was thrilling at first. but amid the extravagance, philipp meyer was sickened by a moral deficit at the heart of america’s financial system.”
because my mom took ewan for the night, kaela and i managed to have a spur of the moment "date night." we used a groupon to dine at three seasons vietnamese fusion restaurant in stanfurd territory and then watched the avengers on imax 3d at the vallco amc. we hadn't done something like that in a long time. it was a much needed break from the usual routine. the shaved head guy in the background just so happens to be one of my coworkers.

because my mom took ewan for the night, kaela and i managed to have a spur of the moment "date night." we used a groupon to dine at three seasons vietnamese fusion restaurant in stanfurd territory and then watched the avengers on imax 3d at the vallco amc. we hadn't done something like that in a long time. it was a much needed break from the usual routine. the shaved head guy in the background just so happens to be one of my coworkers.

some poorly lit photos of some delicious food - from left to right, top to bottom: my viet.tini cocktail, string beans and shiitake mushrooms, scorpion spring rolls (since i wasn't eating grains today, i skipped this), malaysian grass.fed colorado lamb satay, shaking beef, and sea bass

some poorly lit photos of some delicious food - from left to right, top to bottom: my viet.tini cocktail, string beans and shiitake mushrooms, scorpion spring rolls (since i wasn't eating grains today, i skipped this), malaysian grass.fed colorado lamb satay, shaking beef, and sea bass

Posted in career, diet, dining, dj business, ewan, family, fine dining, food, health, parenting, personal finances | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

remembering to refuel

Posted on 2012년May월9일, Wednesday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년05월09일; 수요일 밤, 833p: i’m at 로렌스 플라자 lawrence plaza food court.  i’ve had a long, difficult day.  as i said yesterday, i am a bit overburdened right now, and that’s saying a lot because i’m not usually a complainer… at least not that bad of one.  i ate 육계장 yookgyeijang from dishes for dinner.  i wanted 도가니탕 doganitang to heal my sore body, but they didn’t have it tonight.  i haven’t been eating well these days.  it’s not so much that i’m eating unhealthily but that i’ve noticed that i’m not eating enough these days.  it’s very unusual for me to say something like that.  i’ve been exercising decently well, made it to 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé three days in a row so far this week.  however, i’m not eating enough to let my body recover.  i’m also obviously not sleeping enough.  work is busy, and i also have lots of dj stuff that i need to do; by, as usual, it’s all the housework and housechores that is hurting me so bad.  however, i have no escape and no relief.  well, i’m thankful for my mom’s help.

i should have realised that 팥빙수 patbingsoo from snowice would be so therapeutic for all of us. ewan so eagerly dug into the dessert as soon as it arrived.

i should have realised that 팥빙수 patbingsoo from snowice would be so therapeutic for all of us. ewan so eagerly dug into the dessert as soon as it arrived.

Posted in dining, ewan, exercise, family, food, health, korean, parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

ewan has been accepted into school!

Posted on 2012년May월8일, Tuesday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년05월08일, 화요일 저녁 이지만 아직도 퇴근 안했어요: my calves are so sore from crossfit.  i made it to the 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé yesterday and today.  i think it was only yesterday’s workout that totally killed my calves.  today’s was hard, but i still think it was yesterday’s workout that did this to me.  i hope i’ll be okay to workout tomorrow morning.  we’ll see.  i’m missing taekwondo practice right now because i had a late conference call meeting tonight at work.  *sigh*  i’ve got a lot to do.  i honestly do feel a little overburdened right now.  i have a lot to do at work and a lot to do for my dj business.  also, this coming sunday is mother’s day.

[a little later] earlier today, i received an email from the neighbourhood christian center preschool.  ewan reached the top of the wait list today.  wow, that’s exciting!  however, it’s also very scary because it’s so expensive!  *sigh* what are we going to do?!

[later] below are some pictures from last night:

really? this kid is going to start school next month?

really? this kid is going to start school next month?

after i took ewan to kids club at the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport, we did some grocery shopping at the new safeway there. ewan insisted on sitting in the big bin of the shopping cart. when i posted this to facebook, so many of my friends said they still enjoy riding shopping carts in this fashion. can i expect to see someday a college student ewan doing this?

after i took ewan to kids club at the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport, we did some grocery shopping at the new safeway there. ewan insisted on sitting in the big bin of the shopping cart. when i posted this to facebook, so many of my friends said they still enjoy riding shopping carts in this fashion. can i expect to see someday a college student ewan doing this?

Posted in career, ewan, family, parenting, personal finances | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

kids club at the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport

Posted on 2012년May월7일, Monday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년05월07일; 월요일 밤, 758p: i’m at the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport, stretching after doing 30 minutes on the adaptive elliptical, the exact antithesis of crossfit.  well, i made it to the 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé this morning.  i mostly came here to bring ewan to kids club.  it was a hot day today.  it feels as if summer has arrived early.  i made it out to the sunnyvale skate park today for a short lunchtime skateboarding session before going home to barbeque burgers for lunch.  the park was far from crowded today.  maybe the heat and sun chased people out.  right now, the beautiful kaela hwang is watching the five.year engagement at the amc mercado 20 with girls from the grx women’s ministry.

today, during my lunch break; after skateboarding for a bit in the heat, i came home to barbeque some burgers to make cheeseburgers with aguacate... protein style, of course! kaela found the patties too be too rare and insisted on microwaving hers to cook them more.

today, during my lunch break; after skateboarding for a bit in the heat, i came home to barbeque some burgers to make cheeseburgers with aguacate... protein style, of course! kaela found the patties too be too rare and insisted on microwaving hers to cook them more.

Posted in cooking, ewan, exercise, non-asian movies, parenting, skateboarding, western media | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

어린이날 uhrininal (children’s day) taking ewan around the bay

Posted on 2012년May월6일, Sunday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년05월06일; 일요일 저녁, 702p: the feeling of “not having anything to do” is not relaxing for me.  rather, it stresses me out.  to me, “not having anything to do” does not exist, having that feeling just means that i’m forgetting to do something.  that stresses me out.  yesterday was a very busy day, yet that was my version of rest, relaxation, recuperation, and recovery.

[later] yesterday, i woke up in the morning and got ewan ready for the day earlier than i usually would on a saturday.  then i drove the beautiful kaela hwang up to alameda along with ewan.  kaela had another one of her chiropractic seminars on saturday.  i woke up early, but she didn’t wake up as early; so we ended up in a rush.  she had me stop at the mcdonald’s drive.thru (mcdrive) near our house before getting on the freeway.  unfortunately, it was not a “grain day” for me, so i couldn’t really eat anything there.  i ordered their strawberry.banana smoothie though.  ewan drank most of it.  well, i dropped kaela off at her seminar.  then i took ewan and drove across the bay bridge and through san francisco down to half moon bay for a site visit for a wedding that i’m djing on the sunday before memorial day.  it’s at the oceano hotel.  after the site visit, ewan and i walked on the beach just a little.  then we tried to look for lunch.

here are a couple of pictures of ewan in the lobby of the oceano hotel in half moon bay. maybe it's just because i'm his dad, but i think these pictures are so cute.

here are a couple of pictures of ewan in the lobby of the oceano hotel in half moon bay. maybe it's just because i'm his dad, but i think these pictures are so cute.

here are some other pictures from our short trip to (or stop in) half moon bay. again, i find the pictures of ewan to be just so cute.

here are some other pictures from our short trip to (or stop in) half moon bay. again, i find the pictures of ewan to be just so cute.

i stopped at a place in pacifica, a little strip mall.  i saw a taqueria.  however, when i went in; the old man at the counter said that they weren’t yet open, and he wasn’t even nice about it; so i resolved not to eat there.  the only other eateries in that strip mall were a pizzeria (and it was a grain.free day for me, not a “grain day”) and a café, which was supercrowded.  i had no choice but just to bring ewan into the fresh & easy and buy some food to tie us over: a couple of cups of chobani greek yoghurt and a small bag of organic banana chips (cooked in organic coconut oil, which is a good thing because it’s better than any kind of “vegetable” oil).  *sigh* kind of like skateboarding bums hanging outside of a 7-eleven (i remember doing that in my adolescent days), i fed ewan his yoghurt cups while hanging just outside of fresh & easy.  well, pacifica is a total surfside town; and, in fact, that parking lot is used by a ton of surfers to park while surf at the beach just down below; so i guess people understood that i wasn’t being a negligent dad by feeding my son somewhere other than a proper dining table.  well, after that snack, i got us back on the road in hunt for a kid.friendly restaurant with gluten.free options.  i kept checking my yelp mobile app at every stoplight, but i wasn’t finding anything too good.  then, as i drove up highway 1, ewan fell asleep.  after all, i had woken him up in the morning instead of letting him wake up on his own, you know?

well, instead of pulling over somewhere along the coast, i just kept driving to san francisco.  i was getting hungry and knew better than just to skip lunch and let ewan skip lunch.  thus, i parked on clement street.  i used to hang out on clement street a little when i first started working for the 3d microscope company, which was located at the time at the nearby california pacific medical center.  i found a metered parking space after circling around a bit. then i parked.  i wasn’t sure if i should let ewan sleep more or not, but then he woke up.  i got the stroller out since i figured we might have to walk a bit to find a good restaurant.  it took a while to get everything out of the car and ewan into the stroller.  then i fed the meter for one hour.  i had seen a couple of thai restaurants while circling for parking and considered those, but neither really stood out by their yelp reviews.  then i spotted a new hawai’ian restaurant called ono grindz.  that caught my eye, and i made an explicit decision to take us there.  i didn’t want to dilly.dally because i was paying for the metered parking.

well, we entered the restaurant.  printed signs on the door told us that they had just opened and that they were still training their staff but that we were welcomed to dine there.  i got us a table for two with a highchair.  at first, i thought about ordering a bbq chicken salad, but i figured that ewan would not enjoy it at all, so instead i ordered this kalua pork eggs benedict without bread (it was supposed to come with hawai’ian bread) and a bowl of fruit with li hing mui powder.  i told the waiter to bring out the entrée first so that ewan wouldn’t just eat the fruit.  since it was the restaurant’s first day, they took a bit long to deliver our food, but the owner and servers were very nice.  when my kalua pork eggs benedict arrived; it looked very delicious, but i noticed that they hadn’t left out the bread as i asked.  i can imagine that the chef was too nervous and focused on making the dish per the recipe.  oh well.  at least ewan didn’t want to eat the bread; so i easily just tossed it to the side of the plate.  unfortunately, he really wasn’t into the dish at all.  at most, he wanted to eat the red pepper from my potato hash (some people call them home fries).  well, when the fruit bowl came, he ate lots of pineapple, mango, and oranges.  he wasn’t so into the finger bananas though.  i don’t know why.  well, it was a good lunch and not super expensive.

ewan and me at ono grindz on clement street in san francisco, california

ewan and me at ono grindz on clement street in san francisco, california

when we left the restaurant, i had to jog us back to the car because i knew the meter was expired, and i saw a meter maid.  strangely enough, the meter maid skipped our block though.  then as i got closer, i saw that he/she had already ticketed my car as well as others on the block.  when i opened up the envelope to read the ticket, i was a little surprised.  well, first i was shocked by the $50 price tag for the ticket.  then i saw that the meter maid had ticketed me before my meter had expired and ticketed me not for an expired meter but for not curbing my tires!  i was shocked because the road was so flat.  well, honestly, as i put ewan in the stroller and fed the meter, i noticed that my tires weren’t curbed.  i’m usually very strict about curbing my tires.  however, i figured that the road was flat enough.  *sigh*  i can’t believe this nonsense.  i’m going to try to write a letter to ask for a “just a warning” or a “reduced fine,” but it certainly will be a case of “hoping for the best but expecting the worst.”

*sigh* anyway, from there i thought i’d take ewan somewhere to run around.  i drove past japantown and so that they had a cool festival going on.  apparently, it was a taiko festival.  however, i decided that i didn’t want to park again in san francisco.  i drove us past union square.  i knew that the macy’s department store had a special performance event that afternoon in celebration of asian.pacific.american heritage month.  originally, i wanted to take ewan to watch that; but i was just too exhausted from our earlier activities.  instead, i started driving us across the bay bridge back to the east bay.  after all, kaela wanted me to send off some student loan documents, and i knew the post offices in berkeley better than the ones in san francisco.

i drove us to college avenue, to the elmwood district.  i knew there was a post office there with a parking lot.  i parked and brought ewan in.  the lady at the counter meanly sad that she was closed even though i saw lots of customers waiting there.  i looked again at the hours posted on the door and realised that the counter closed at 300p, and that it was almost 315p. *sigh* she was right, but it was not a pleasant situation for me.  i needed to use a restroom and needed a cool drink; so, after letting ewan run around the stairs and ramp of the post office a little, i had us walk down college avenue a little.  we ended up at a café called a cuppa tea.  i think it’s owned and operated by a vietnamese family.  i ordered a large carrot juice for us, but the man asked if i’d like a watermelon juice instead.  that sure sounded good, so i agreed.  we rested for a bit and enjoyed the juice.  however, i knew we had to go find another post office.  furthermore, i knew i couldn’t leave my car parked at the post office.  when we got back to the car, ewan asked to eat one of his pouches of “beef stew” baby food, so i fed that to him.

at a cuppa tea café on college avenue in berkeley's elmwood district, ewan enjoyed our watermelon juice on a hot day.

at a cuppa tea café on college avenue in berkeley's elmwood district, ewan enjoyed our watermelon juice on a hot day.

then we drove through the uc berkeley (cal) campus area to the shattuck area post office.  they have a 10 minute parking zone.  i sent off kaela’s student loan documents there.  then, i wanted to take ewan around campus; but i worried about the time.  i knew i needed to pick kaela up at 600p, and it was now approaching 500p, four something.  thus, instead i just started driving back down to alameda.  along the way, ewan fell asleep.

in my car, ewan fell asleep for his second nap of the day.

in my car, ewan fell asleep for his second nap of the day.

well, i sat in the parking lot for over an hour, waiting for kaela.  i worried that she would get out early from her seminar and want me to rush over.  instead, i saw lots of other people walk out, but she didn’t come out till much later.  then we had to find dinner.  i had just come from berkeley and wasn’t all that into driving back up, but she wanted to go to berkeley, so we went.  i drove us to the campus area.  we found parking on durant avenue, near bowditch street.  we walked around the telegraph avenue area.  kaela said the place stunk so bad.  i didn’t mind it at all.  i know berkeley isn’t as clean as the silicon valley; but, i don’t know, i still feel “berkeley enough” to handle it.  searching for food, now that i’m on my grain.free diet, is a lot more complicated than it used to be.  breakfast, lunch, and dinner were all not easy for me.  surprisingly, we ended up at maoz vegetarian.  it’s a european chain that sells falafels.  apparently, an israeli couple started it in amsterdam in 1991년.  that was a strange choice because i rarely eat vegetarian with my grain.free diet and kaela just came from that seminar, in which they discussed all the health drawbacks of vegetarianism and veganism.  we each ordered one of their salad bowl combos with a special blended juice and also got an order of sweet potato fries.  it was a lot of food.  each salad came with five falafel balls and a choice of two “add.ons.”  kaela picked hard boiled egg and baba ghanouj.  i picked hard boiled egg and aguacate (avocado).  as you see, we both insisted on getting some beneficial animal protein through egg.  at the restaurant, when you order a salad bowl, they give you the falafel balls, lettuce, and your “add.ons” in a bowl.  then you add your own salad ingredients from the salad bar – only one trip.  i filled my bowl up with lots of beets and some green cabbage slaw and some red cabbage slaw.  i also grabbed some red peppers for ewan and some olives.  i didn’t have much room for other things because i really piled on the beets.  kaela laughed at how high i piled my bowl.  i really also got lots of yoghurt (tzatziki) sauce and tahini sauce for the sweet potato fries and also tried their garlic sauce.  i ate so much of the “yoghurt sauce.”  again, i was trying to get protein through beneficial animal products.  i’m grain.free, but i still do dairy, as you know.  we got special blended juices with our meals.  i think mine was called “the oski” or something like that.  it had kale in it.  ewan didn’t cooperate too well with dinner.  he ate a little but not a lot.  he mostly just wanted the sweet potato fries.  he also kaela’s juice well.  he likes “smoothies,” you know?  since we ate such a big dinner, i thought that we would stroll around the campus area after dinner; but instead we got right back on the road and headed home.  well, it was getting late anyway.

my falafel salad bowl at maoz vegetarian in berkeley: aguacate, hard boiled eggs, olives, cabbage slaws, and lots of beets

my falafel salad bowl at maoz vegetarian in berkeley: aguacate, hard boiled eggs, olives, cabbage slaws, and lots of beets

[later] today (sunday) was different from saturday.  kaela went off on her own to her seminar, driving herself to alameda.  i got ewan all ready at home in the morning.  we headed out to the sunnyvale skate park before church at grx, but ewan insisted on bringing sooni with us.  i figured it was safe enough to do so since i’ve seen other dogs at church before.  well, we headed out to the skate park.  it wasn’t a long session, but it was fun.  we met up with shelton  he didn’t bring cailley though.  it was already getting so warm in the morning.  furthermore, i felt kind of sluggish and bloated because i ate too much random junk for breakfast.  after skating just a little and letting ewan play a little, i brought ewan and sooni over to church at grx.  i dropped ewan off at kidzone as usual and attended service.  afterward, i had to do offering counting.  for a while, i let some friends hold onto sooni’s leash while i counted the offering.  later, some little girls were walking sooni around the courtyard. a man that works for the school where our church meets saw sooni.  he asked me, “sir, is that your dog?”  i said she was my dog.  then he sternly said, “there’s no dogs on campus.”  he wasn’t very nice about it.  i just abruptly said, “oh, sorry” and got ready to leave with ewan and sooni.  i was kind of perplexed at how unfriendly he was about the whole thing being that we were supposedly all christians, with his working at a christian school and my being at church service.  he was one of those older, later generation asian.americans, i.e. an older asian.american guy who was most likely born here.  i don’t know if he maybe felt that his being asian and my being asian gave him the right to be more pushy; maybe.  i don’t like that kind of attitude within the community.  it ought to be more of an attitude of “oh, hey… you’re a ‘brother,’ i’m a ‘brother,’ i’ll give you the hook.ups, i’ll be especially nice to you.”  whatever.

well, ewan and i ate lunch today at the word on the streatz food truck party at wilcox high school, which is right by our house.  i had shelton’s family meet us there: shelton, holly, cailley, and carson.  they got there before us since i had to count the offering at church and convince the little girls to give sooni back to ewan and me.  i first bought a spicy chirashi from we sushi.  ewan just ate the rice.  then i got one beef and one chicken “lotus wrap” lettuce wraps from forbitten city.  it was a hot day, but the party had tables in the shade, which was nice.  there was a dj crew there spinning tunes just as i had done at the second word on the streeatz party.  i was the first dj that they ever had; and, honestly, i know i did a much better job than that dj crew, but whatever.  it was also nice just to be able to enjoy the party, right?  cailley was asleep at first, but then she woke up.  i like how ewan and cailley play together.  it used to be that cailley was more enthusiastic about playing together than ewan was, but now ewan looks forward to it so much.  they two played with sooni.  people were so impressed at what a good, calm dog sooni is.

cailley and ewan took sooni for a walk around the word on the streeatz food truck party.

cailley and ewan took sooni for a walk around the word on the streeatz food truck party.

i thought that kaela might come join us at the food truck party after her seminar, but she stayed there at the seminar for a long time afterward.  she didn’t come home until much later.  because she didn’t come home, i had to drag ewan with me to meet a dj client.  at least he slept through that.  he was so tired.  after kaela finally came home, we eventually talked about dinner.  i knew that we needed to use up some group buying vouchers like a google offer to red crane that expires on 2012년05월08일, but red crane now doesn’t open on sundays or mondays.  we ended up using a gift check coupon from a gift check coupon book i bought from a door.to.door salesperson on friday evening.  we went to tony and alba’s pizza and pasta and got gluten.free pizza and pasta.  it was a “grain day” for me today.  ewan was so excited to go out for pizza; but when we ate, he preferred the gluten.free pasta over the gluten.free pizza.  funny guy!

tonight, with our dinner of gluten.free pizza and gluten.free pasta at tony and alba's, i enjoyed a bottle of redbridge gluten.free bier.

tonight, with our dinner of gluten.free pizza and gluten.free pasta at tony and alba's, i enjoyed a bottle of redbridge gluten.free bier.

toward the end of a long day, ewan and i take some 셀카 selca pictures together on the floor of his bedroom. will that remain his bedroom, or will he move to the other bedroom to make room for the next baby? in the last picture, he's pretending to eat a pom.pom.

toward the end of a long day, ewan and i take some 셀카 selca pictures together on the floor of his bedroom. will that remain his bedroom, or will he move to the other bedroom to make room for the next baby? in the last picture, he's pretending to eat a pom.pom.

i'm guessing that at some point, ewan's bath pictures won't be so cute.

i'm guessing that at some point, ewan's bath pictures won't be so cute.

Posted in asian-american, diet, dining, dj, dj business, ewan, family, food, hole-in-wall dining, parenting, skateboarding, sooni | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

filled with nutrition, not just filling the stomach

Posted on 2012년May월3일, Thursday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년05월03일, 목요일 오후: i missed crossfit yesterday, so i was back with a vengeance this morning.

yesterday, ewan woke up just before 500a, and i know it’s because he was hungry.  he didn’t eat well the night before.  neither did i.  we went to our friend sohee’s dinner thing at 옛날 짜장 yeitnal jjajang.  as i said in my previous post, i didn’t have many options on the menu with my grain.free diet.  man, in the past, both 짜장면 jjajangmyuhn and 짱뽕 jjambbong were two of my favourite foods.  i would have to say that 짬뽕 jjambbong used to be my absolute favourite dish.  now that i’ve gone grain.free, i can no longer enjoy these foods.  i had that 국수 없는 짬뽕 gooksoo uhbsneun jjambbong (jjambbong without noodles).  it was okay but not nearly as enjoyable as the original dish.  it didn’t really fill me up either.  ewan didn’t want any of the 짜장밥 jjajangbab that the beautiful kaela hwang ordered.  he just kept asking for his 단무지 danmooji (pickled daikon radish).  we don’t like him to eat too much of that because it usually has saccharine in it.  *sigh* awful…

anyway, yeah, he woke up early on wednesday morning, i.e. yesterday.  i missed crossfit.  i thought about going to a later class after work, but work got busy and my knee felt swollen and sore.  at first, i thought i had overdone it on monday and tuesday with all those sumo deadlift highpulls  and the kettlebell exercises as well as the taekwondo workout.  however, i later realised that the weather forecast called for rain today, so that is probably what was causing my knee to feel swollen and sore: a low pressure “system.”  when i checked the weather earlier in the day yesterday, i saw he forecast for rain.  when i checked it again, late at night, the forecast for rain turned to a forecast for just cloudy skies.  i ran common errands instead of exercising: i went to the sunnyvale costco and picked up frozen organic blueberries and organic brown eggs.  i wanted to buy frontline flea drops for sooni, but they didn’t have the kind for her size, only large and extra large dogs.  i think she uses the one for medium dogs.  then i went to sprouts to buy some organic beef hot dogs some sausages (i ended up getting pork bratwurst and pork polish sausage) because i was hoping to cook them with probiotic sauerkraut, some raw almonds for my blueberry.almond smoothies, and some organic prune juice for ewan.  then i swung by our pick up spot for our organic raw milk delivery.  i thought that kaela was having beet kvass and sauerkraut delivered this week.  it wasn’t there, and kaela later confirmed that it will arrive next week.

when i got home, our friend sohee was over.  she had come to visit kaela and ewan.  she had already eaten dinner.  i cooked a sort of 김치 찌개 kimchi jjigae dish: 김치 kimchi, 무 moo (daikon radish), 삼겹살 samgyuhbsal, organic beef hot dogs, and organic colby jack cheese.  it turned out pretty well.  we ate that for dinner.  it was a pretty uneventful evening.  again, i tried to play guitar and sing “music together” songs with ewan, but he kept wanting to grab the guitar himself.  after sohee left and after just trying to tidy up the place a little, i pretty much got ewan ready for bed and them put him to bed.  then i went to sleep.  i’m not sure what time it was at that point.  i didn’t take a shower last night or this morning.

this morning, i woke up in time for the 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé.  i saw the wod (workout of the day) on the site, and it looked doable.  my abs were still sore from the situps in tuesday’s workout, but i felt okay doing today’s sumo deadlifts and rowing sprints.  after the workout, i went home and did my usual morning thing.  i made myself the smoothie that i usually make these days: frozen organic blueberries; raw almonds; bananas; organic, raw milk; plain greek yoghurt; and plenty of pure organic whey protein powder.  my banana today was so unripe.  i wish i had bought some more ripe, yellow bananas during my grocery shopping last night.  i don’t know why this batch of bananas is ripening so slowly.  i also heated up the leftover 김치 찌개 kimchi jjigae and ate that with ewan.  time flies in the morning.  i wanted to take ewan out to walk sooni, as we did yesterday; but we ran out of time.

yeah, yesterday, since ewan was awake so early and since i had missed crossfit; we took sooni for a decently long walk around the neighbourhood.  we went to machado park.  ewan played on the swings and slides for a little.  on our way back, we stopped by calabazas creek to feed the ducks.  when we got there, the creek had two male, mallard ducks.  then a third male joined them.  where were all the female ducks?  sometimes, i think the “man josé” thing also applies to the wildlife around here.  for more information about “man josé,” you can read these two articles: “man jose” by william dean hinton, published in the silicon valley metro on 2005년08월03일 and “san jose looking more like ‘man jose’: men sure seem to know the way to san jose,” by bob redell, published on nbcbayarea.com on 수요일 wednesday; 2009년02월11일.  in that second article; did you see that in our area, in the heart of the silicon valley; men outnumber women 125 to 100, which is 1.25 to 1.  at least i’m married; but, gee, don’t you feel so bad for my single guy friends?  single girls in the silicon valley need to realise how good they have it; and it isn’t just a case of “the odds are good, but the goods are odd” here.

well, yesterday, kaela rushed ewan off to swim class.  today, she rushed him off to “music together” class.  we pay so much for all these activities: swim class, “music together,” gymboree… i’m just glad that ewan really seems to enjoy them.  he talks about all of them a lot.  well, actually, this morning, he said he wanted to go to the skate park and see cailley.  that was very cute.  i feel a little bad that shelton didn’t bring cailley to the skate park last sunday because i know ewan wanted to see her there.  well, this whole week, mornings have been pretty long, and i’ve had to rush off to work.  i need kaela to wake up earlier, but i can only wish for that.

[later] 저녁 이지만 아직도 퇴근 안했어요: man, i spent so much of my day at work working on booking travel for this business trip to austin.  however, now my manager wants to cut the trip short and have me return on wednesday evening instead of thursday morning.  i have to see what can be done.

today, kaela brought ewan over to grace and mark’s house for lunch with their sons wesley and warren.  since she was there, i used my lunch break wisely and headed over to the sunnyvale skate park for a lunchtime skateboarding session.  the sky remained relatively overcast the whole day, i guess.  actually, i wasn’t outside in the later part of the afternoon and haven’t made it out yet this evening, so i don’t know for sure.  anyway, it felt great (as it pretty much always does) to go skateboarding.  it recharges me.  it’s an essential part of my day.  i had fun.  the park wasn’t too crowded but was still far from empty.  some guy had a little dog with him, and it chased some of us around the skate park.  well, it didn’t really “chase” us but just followed us, which is good.  it wasn’t too annoying of a dog even though it was a small dog.  after skateboarding, i headed back to the office and bought lunch from the corporate cafeteria.  i bought a gyros plate, but i had the guy leave out the pita and couscous.  i hope to hit the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport before going home because i need to shower.  yeah, of course, i would like to work out; but, more importantly, i need to shower.  i didn’t shower last night or this morning, and i feel like i must have forgotten to wash my hair the last time i did shower.  yesterday, my hair felt greasy even though i took a shower on tuesday night.  strange…  i feel nasty.

a few articles i’ve read lately and found worthy of sharing:

  1. “against the grain: 10 reasons to give up grains” published by “jenny” on 2009년05월01일 on nourishedkitchen.com
  2. “poor need nutrition, not cheap food” by lois collins, published on 2012년05월03일 in deseret news
  3. “10 things your commencement speaker won’t tell you” by charles wheelan, published in the wall street journal on 2012년04월30일
  4. “here’s why google and facebook might completely disappear in the next 5 years” by erick jackson, published on forbes.com on 2012년04월30일
  5. “let’s just say it: the republicans are the problem,” by thomas e. mann and norman j. ornstein, published in the washington post on 2012년04월27일
  6. “the truth about beer: from born.on dating to ice cold bottles, these beer myths persist,” by pete brown, posted on menshealth.com on 2012년05월02일
i had to prepare a dinner salad before kaela came home from work but also had to keep ewan amused by taking a few 셀카 selca (self camera: just another way that koreans use english better than americans) with him.

i had to prepare a dinner salad before kaela came home from work but also had to keep ewan amused by taking a few 셀카 selca (self camera: just another way that koreans use english better than americans) with him.

Posted in career, cooking, diet, ewan, exercise, food, non-asian music, parenting, politics, skateboarding, technology, travel | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

t.h.e. (the hardest ever) – “you can go hard, or you can go home.”

Posted on 2012년May월1일, Tuesday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년05월01일, 화요일 아침: right now, i’m in ewan’s bedroom, waiting for him to wake up.  he is sleeping in.  he briefly woke up when i was getting ready to head out to the 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé.  i went into his room to shut off his nightlight because i had accidentally left it on all night.  i managed to get in and out of his room without waking him up, but then he woke up while i was brushing my teeth in the hallway bathroom.  he cried out to me for a little bit but then fell back asleep.  i made it to crossfit.  it was a good workout.  two days in a row of intense workout, lots of back exercises.  yesterday was all kettlebell stuff.  today was more about sumo deadlift highpull.  i’ve been trying to go harder this week than last week.  i feel like i didn’t go hard enough last week.  i need to make up for lost time in many ways this week.  may has begun.

at lunchtime; after a short skateboarding session at the sunnyvale skate park, i headed toward home but knew that i wouldn't have much "grain.free" food available, so i decided to find the mogo truck in the parking lot of some credit union on bowers avenue, near our house. apparently, the truck had arrived late, so there was a long line. i bought the usual tortilla.free tacos (2 sets of 3, one of each standard meat choice). this time, the beautiful kaela hwang found the meat too greasy. that's an off and on problem with mogo. sometimes it isn't so greasy, but today it was greasier than usual. well, at least i got the pilipino coconut aisukuriimu from the scoops truck. no complaints about that one...

at lunchtime; after a short skateboarding session at the sunnyvale skate park, i headed toward home but knew that i wouldn't have much "grain.free" food available, so i decided to find the mogo truck in the parking lot of some credit union on bowers avenue, near our house. apparently, the truck had arrived late, so there was a long line. i bought the usual tortilla.free tacos (2 sets of 3, one of each standard meat choice). this time, the beautiful kaela hwang found the meat too greasy. that's an off and on problem with mogo. sometimes it isn't so greasy, but today it was greasier than usual. well, at least i got the pilipino coconut aisukuriimu from the scoops truck. no complaints about that one...

tonight, we went out do dinner again after taekwondo practice at u.s. taekwondo academy because our friend sohee came back to california. she has been based in new york city for the past few years now but recently came back from a period spent in london. i forget how long, months? anyway, this is a horrible picture that i tried to take of the group using the front.facing camera on my 삼성 samsung galaxy nexus. i might have had some shots that captured more of the people, but they were too blurry. we at dinner at 옛날 짜장 yeitnal jjajang. on my grain.free diet, i didn't have many menu options, so i had 국수 없는 짬뽕 gooksoo uhbsneun jjambbong (jjambbong without noodles). gee, 짬뽕 jjambbong used to be my favourite dish, but it just ain't the same without the noodles.

tonight, we went out do dinner again after taekwondo practice at u.s. taekwondo academy because our friend sohee came back to california. she has been based in new york city for the past few years now but recently came back from a period spent in london. i forget how long, months? anyway, this is a horrible picture that i tried to take of the group using the front.facing camera on my 삼성 samsung galaxy nexus. i might have had some shots that captured more of the people, but they were too blurry. we at dinner at 옛날 짜장 yeitnal jjajang. on my grain.free diet, i didn't have many menu options, so i had 국수 없는 짬뽕 gooksoo uhbsneun jjambbong (jjambbong without noodles). gee, 짬뽕 jjambbong used to be my favourite dish, but it just ain't the same without the noodles.

[later] at work today, i learned that i might be sent on a business trip to our austin office 5월21일 through 5월24일.  this is crazy because i’ll be djing a wedding reception on 토요일 5월19일 saturday, may 19 and then three more on memorial day weekend 토요일 5월26일, 일요일 5월27일, 월요일 5월28일… saturday, may 26; sunday, may 27; and monday, may 28.  crazy!  you know how people like to say, “when it rains it pours?”  well, i guess this is easily one of those situations.  can i do it?  of course, i can.  however, yeah… i might have to spend my nights in my hotel room working on music stuff.  also, something to consider although of lesser importance: what about my crossfit routine?  can i try to visit a box in austin?  that’s a bit of a tradition in the crossfit community, but i don’t know if i’m too much of a newbie to be doing that kind of thing.

tonight, kaela shared our big news on facebook: we’re expecting our second baby at the end of 10월 october or early 11월 november!  now you might better understand what has been happening around our house.  you may or my not have noticed that i’ve been doing even more housework lately.  yeah, ever since kaela found out that we’re pregnant, she has been feeling constant morning sickness except for when she has been traveling for her chiropractic stuff.  thus, yeah, cooking and cleaning?  i was already doing most of it, but even she had to concede that i’m pretty much doing all of it nowadays.  i honestly don’t know if there will be an end to that.  i figure i simply have to adjust to being a full.time dad, a full.time engineer, and a part.time dj.

there’s this bit of internet folklore that has been making its rounds about facebook these days although i’m sure i had read it in the past as a email forward.  (if you notice i specifically avoid the term “meme” because it has roots in the religiously atheist community.  thus i have resorted to misusing somewhat the term “folklore” even though i studied a bit of folklore studies in college and know the proper use of the term.)  it tells the story of a professor that shows his class a big empty jar.  then he fills the jar up with some rocks.  he asks the class if the jar is full, and they say it is.  then he pours some pebbles into the jar, and those pebbles fill up the space between the rocks.  he again asks the class if the jar is full, and they say it is.  then he pours sand into the jar, and the sand fills up the space between the pebbles.  he again asks for and gets confirmation that the jar is full.  finally, he pulls out two cups of coffee from  underneath the table and pours them into the jar.  he then gives the moral of the exercise: you should fill your life up first with the most important things, i.e. your family, your health, and close friends, and your passions in life.  these are the rocks.  then add the pebbles, which are things like your job, your house, and your car.  then add the sand, which is all the other small stuff.  then a student asks about the two cups of coffee, and the professor says that it just goes to show that, no matter how full your life seems, you always have room to share a couple of cups of coffee with your friend.  my recount of the story is more like true folklore because i typed it in my own words instead of copying and pasting, forwarding, or hitting the facebook “share” button.  it is a new version with variation.  however, if you want to find a more popular version out on the internet (as opposed to “the internot,” which is facebook… because when people waste time on facebook they never leave facebook and thus never actually go on the internet), then you may want to check out one of these links i found from googling “empty jar rocks pebbles sand two cups of coffee”:

  1. “the story of an empty jar and the 2 cups of coffee…” on hariprasade’s blog “exploring technology,” published 2007년08월31일:a very poorly formatted version in a very “web 1.0″ fashion.
  2. “the mayonnaise jar” on youtube, uploaded by karadale30 on 2010년02월11일: this video version has at the beginning a picture of someone that i think is supposed to be jesus, but i’m not sure.  the rest of the video is mostly a bunch of stock photos and borrowed graphics timed with a “new age” soundtrack.  i hate to call this kind of music “new age.”  it’s basically music you would hear while getting a massage at a spa.  let’s call it “spa music” instead because “new age…”  well, it just doesn’t sit well with me.

now, as i said this item kind of touches upon folklore, you should check out a thread about it on the snopes.com forums (snopes.com is an almost but not really academic website about folklore): “the mayonnaise jar and two cups of coffee” started by “mrs. matthews” on 2007년06월23일.  many of the other forum members rightfully point out that, even though people like to tell the story as if it originated from a college professor in his philosophy class; that really makes no sense because college classes and college philosophy classes are nothing like this.  they say it would be better “attributed” to a pastor or a motivational speaker.  that’s very true.

anyway, yeah… as cheesy as this story is, i must insist that this is exactly how i live my life!  people are always amazed at how i can squeeze so much activity into my life.  how can i be a full.time engineer; a “part.time” dj that is very busy, almost to the point of not really being “part.time” anymore; and a full.time dad as well as a skateboarder, snowboarder, and taekwondoist?  the “mayonnaise jar,” rocks, pebbles, sand, and two cups of coffee…  this explains my life so well.  it’s not easy.  don’t ever assume that it’s “easy.”  it’s not!  however, it’s possible.  it all fits.  more than anything, i must thank god.  after all, it’s almost like loaves and fishes.  my life belongs to my saviour jesus.  if he wants to use me this way, so be it.

one recent song that i’ve been enjoying is flo rida’s “wild ones” featuring sia.  there’s one line that i’m not sure if i’m mishearing or not.  it sounds to me like flo rida is rapping “i gotta be the man, be the head of my fam.”  from a google search, i see that other netizens are hearing it as i do, but i fear that we are all mistaken and that the real lyrics are “i gotta be the man when they heading my van.”  that pops up more often, so it must be right.  personally, i like my version better.  being a man and the head of your fam, that‘s what makes you a real wild one.

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music sounds better with you

Posted on 2012년April월30일, Monday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월30일, 월요일 오후: it’s amazing how quickly 4월 april flew by, huh? [later] yup, 5월 may begins tomorrow.  we’re like right in the middle of spring, aren’t we?  [later] okay, after doing some arithmetic, i believe that the “middle of spring” was last week.  we are now in the second half of spring.  days are still getting longer until summer starts on 06월20일.  *sigh* wow, time flies.  i hope i’m making the best use of my time.  i really do.

well, this past weekend, i was busy.  i djed that wedding that got moved up.  i spent a good amount of time working on it; but, as i said, since i’m now much more experienced than i was in the past, i am so much more relaxed about djing weddings.  on friday evening and on saturday morning, the beautiful kaela hwang and i attended the grx marriage seminar at the grx ministry center.  well; on friday, during the day, our friend maureen brought her sons over to our house to play with ewan.  kaela texted me and told me to buy some thai food and bring it home.  i was really busy with work, but i managed to print out a menu from thai lemongrass, pick out a bunch of items, and then phone in an order.  i sacrificed my friday lunchtime skateboarding session and headed straight from the office over to the restaurant to pick up my order.  i called kaela to let her know i was on the way to pick up the food.  she told me she had already ordered lunch from dusita and was picking up her order.  what a mess!  we easily had at least twice as much food as we really needed but more likely even more than twice as much as we needed.  we had so much thai food.  well, to see it all in a positive light; now, we could sample food from both restaurants and decide which we liked better.  i already had my opinions on the two: i feel that thai lemongrass is not as fancy, but maybe more “home style,” while dusita is fancier and is probably more “restaurant style.”  well, in the evening, we ate some lunch leftovers for dinner before rushing off to that grx marriage seminar.

the speaker at the grx marriage seminar was pastor rick larson.  it was a good event.  it kind of felt to me like i was listening to a series of sermons from wedding ceremonies, and i mean that in a very good way.  i go to a lot of weddings, not just wedding receptions.  i often provide music and audio support and wedding ceremonies.  i have heard a lot of wedding ceremony sermons.  i like most of the wedding ceremony sermons that i hear.  on sunday morning, at the skate park, when shelton asked me what was the best point i heard at the seminar; i told him about how pastor larson said something about ‘when people talk about marriage, they often say, “it takes two,” but that’s wrong.  it actually takes just one.’  i totally got what he was talking about.  it just takes one person to start making a change.  you really cannot wait for your partner to “get onboard” and to put in his or her “fair share,” do his or her “fair share” of the work.  it was a good seminar, just one evening and one morning.  i wish it could have been longer.  it was nice to have onsite babysitting included.  that was really nice.  we should have more events like this at our church.

well, after the lunch at the end of the marriage seminar, we went home.  i wanted to get right to work on my dj stuff, but i still had to put ewan down for his nap and do other stuff around the house.  eventually, i got to working on dj stuff; but time flew by.  all of the sudden, daniel was over to start packing up.  i shut down my computer, and we loaded everything up.  the wedding was at joy luck palace in the cupertino 99 ranch mall (cupertino village).  [later] we loaded up my car and headed over to the site.  in the past, i found it difficult to manœuver around this restaurant while setting up because the servers are so busy setting up the tables after dimsum.  however; again, i suppose since i’m so much more experienced now than i was in the past, i managed to deal with it.  also, having daniel there made it much easier.

it was a fun wedding to dj.  i didn’t have to mc because the bride and groom got this one couple to do that job since they needed english and cantonese.  i got to sit down with our friends nancy and tim to eat dinner.  when dancing came around; wow, it was so much fun!  the crowd was wild.  i totally feed off that kind of energy when i dj.  i totally appreciate it.  i didn’t realise that gary’s cousin was this one dj that i’ve talked to on facebook, “dj rc” (raymond chen).  it was cool to meet him in person, and i really appreciate his support throughout the night.

these pictures are from my friend tim. he's picture in the lower picture with his wife nancy. i was very happy that they got to party it up while i djed.

these pictures are from my friend tim. he's picture in the lower picture with his wife nancy. i was very happy that they got to party it up while i djed.

on sunday; i woke up as usual, but kaela, ewan, and i all headed over to the sunnyvale skate park before service at grx.  we met up with shelton.  shelton left his kids at home though because he said holly wanted to spend more time with them.  i got to skate with the old.time / old.timer, morning crew for the first time in a long time.  it wasn’t a really long session, but it was longer than what i usually get these days.  i totally appreciated it.  afterward; kaela, ewan, and i headed over to grx for sunday service.  there was a town hall meeting after church, and i stayed for most of it, but we had to leave to eat lunch before it ended.  we ended up at madhuban.  we expected to get buffet, but they didn’t have buffet, only this special thali.  it was a lot of food.  neither of us could finish, and kaela wanted to take her leftovers home, but the manager said that we can’t take leftovers home because of some food safety law.  i guess it’s because they come around and refill your plate.  oh well…

i was really tired and sleepy, but i had to keep pushing forward with the day.  we were hosting my high school friends for a bbq dinner that evening.  we went to costco and bought some groceries.  then i dropped kaela off at home with the groceries and took ewan to sprouts.  after i came home from sprouts, kaela said i needed to buy her more tomatoes.  i left ewan at home this time and headed out to safeway.  i was originally going to make some fancy burger patties; but, since i had run out of time, i bought the nicest frozen patties i could find at safeway.  i was hoping to avoid pink slime.  well, grace and ken came over with their three girls, and our old friend elbert also came over.  i invited nelson and mike too but didn’t hear back from them, and they didn’t show up.  i hope they’re doing okay.

some interesting articles i read today:

  • “[racism] a complete guide to ‘hipster racism’” by lindy west, published on jezebel.com on 2012년04월26일
    • i sometimes feel “victimised” by this kind of racism, but it’s hardly confined to the “hipster” community.  i know a lot of people in positions of comfort and/or privilege like to use “ghetto” speak and hip.hop slang as an ironic joke, just as the article describes.  as an asian.american male; i’m sometimes put in an awkward position because, sure, we’re often called “the model minority”; but, at the same time, we are still a minority.
    • this article presents a lot of problems but doesn’t really present any solutions.  in fact, this probably hurts the cause because it’s easy to accuse the author of just whining and being a killjoy with no sense of humour.
  • “why ios apps look better than android apps” by christina bonnington on wired.com, 2012년04월30일
    • over the past couple of years, i have totally seen the pros and cons of android and ios.
  • “what really kills family values,” by julian zelizer on cnn.com, 2012년04월30일
    • it’s totally true.  i wish more people would read jim wallis’s rediscovering values: on wall street, main street, and your street.
  • “rick ross institute internet archives for study of destructive cults, controversial groups, and movements: faqs,” by rick ross
    • cults are evil.  for some reason; lately, i sense the presence of evil.
lately, ewan wants to take out his "music together" books and look at the pictures of instruments, name them aloud, and then sing some of the songs. i wanted to play guitar for him while he sang, so i brought out my guitar. however, as soon as i took out my guitar, ewan's eyes focused intently on the instrument. then, as if totally obsessed, he quickly grabbed the guitar out of my hand, saying, "i'll do it!" then he started banging on the strings and singing, "hello, everybody." i posted a video of this on facebook.

lately, ewan wants to take out his "music together" books and look at the pictures of instruments, name them aloud, and then sing some of the songs. i wanted to play guitar for him while he sang, so i brought out my guitar. however, as soon as i took out my guitar, ewan's eyes focused intently on the instrument. then, as if totally obsessed, he quickly grabbed the guitar out of my hand, saying, "i'll do it!" then he started banging on the strings and singing, "hello, everybody." i posted a video of this on facebook.

Posted in dj, non-asian music, politics, technology, western media | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

finished the 4월 double header, 삼성 galaxy nexus

Posted on 2012년April월26일, Thursday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월26일, 목요일 점심: i haven’t updated my blog in a very long time…. if you call since last friday “a very long time.”  i do.  i was just so busy over the weekend, and i needed time to recover, i suppose.  honestly, it took me a while to recover from that one long night on last thursday night.  i stayed up so late, working on dj stuff for the weddings.  then i djed a wedding reception in san francisco on saturday evening and a wedding plus reception in san ramon on sunday.  daniel choi was my assistant at both gigs.  my 5월12월 gig got moved up to this saturday.  can you believe that?  it’s actually a very emotional situation: you see, the groom’s mother has been told that she only has a few weeks to live, so the groom has moved up his wedding by a few weeks to make sure that his mom sees him get married.  i haven’t ever had something quite like that happen to my clients.  i had one couple that did a quick civil ceremony to tie the knot just after the bride’s dad passed away.  apparently, that had something to do with traditional chinese superstition.  however, they didn’t move up their public wedding date.

on saturday morning, i brought ewan out to the sunnyvale skate park, skated (skateboarded) for a little, and then took him to gymboree before lunch. i realise that the fact that i can do all this on the morning before a double header of djing weddings just goes to show how much more experienced of a dj i am now than i was in the past. in the past, i was all frazzled before my gigs and during them. now, i feel so much more relaxed. praise god, man.

on saturday morning, i brought ewan out to the sunnyvale skate park, skated (skateboarded) for a little, and then took him to gymboree before lunch. i realise that the fact that i can do all this on the morning before a double header of djing weddings just goes to show how much more experienced of a dj i am now than i was in the past. in the past, i was all frazzled before my gigs and during them. now, i feel so much more relaxed. praise god, man.

on saturday, i found lunch for ewan and me at the moveable feast food truck party on the corner of saratoga avenue and stevens creek boulevard in san josé, right by norcal crossfit san josé. i discovered a cool new korean.indian.mexican taco truck called triple dash 3 (3-3-3). the mini tacos were delicious, but i can't seem to find them on the web. ewan wasn't too into their tacos, but he totally jacked my honey.lemon 보리차 boricha (barley tea). after i finished off the tacos, i bought some taiwanese.fusion "bao" from the chairman truck and brought them home. i shared those with my mom, and i think ewan ate some. my mom babysat ewan when i went off to san francisco to dj saturday night's wedding reception.

on saturday, i found lunch for ewan and me at the moveable feast food truck party on the corner of saratoga avenue and stevens creek boulevard in san josé, right by norcal crossfit san josé. i discovered a cool new korean.indian.mexican taco truck called triple dash 3 (3-3-3). the mini tacos were delicious, but i can't seem to find them on the web. ewan wasn't too into their tacos, but he totally jacked my honey.lemon 보리차 boricha (barley tea). after i finished off the tacos, i bought some taiwanese.fusion "bao" from the chairman truck and brought them home. i shared those with my mom, and i think ewan ate some. my mom babysat ewan when i went off to san francisco to dj saturday night's wedding reception.

anyway; yeah, i djed those two weddings.  the beautiful kaela hwang returned home on sunday from her trip to south carolina.  i was at church at grx when she got home.  she had driven herself home from sfo.  i was checking her location from my phone at church, but the location remained at south carolina.  i assumed something was wrong with her phone.  since my car was full of dj stuff for this double header of djing weddings, i needed a ride to church. shelton drove ewan and me to the skate park for a quick sunday morning skateboarding session.  then he dropped us off for grx service at the king’s academy.  then maureen and justin chen drove us home.

the reason kaela’s location showed up as south carolina that whole time was because she had lost her phone.  she had left it at the airport in greer, south carolina.  she was very upset about having lost her phone, so we had to go out and buy her a new phone on monday at lunch.  since we always match our phones, i also got a new phone.  [later] 오후: well, we ate lunch at tomatina in the mercado shopping center because we expected to buy our phones at the verizon store next door (in the mercado).  kaela and skipped bringing ewan to his monday gymboree class because she said she was looking for her old cell phone to activate it.  later, she brought ewan to the great mall and bought him a new pair of sandals at marshalls along with some gluten.free food.  apparently, they have a good selection of gluten.free snacks there.  at tomatina, i ordered a salad with steak.  kaela ordered some kind of lunch special with soup and pasta.  i could tell ewan was very sleepy and tired.  he didn’t want to eat too much of anything.  he kept asking for cheese from my salad, but there wasn’t much cheese.  i think he ate some chicken from kaela’s pasta.  then we went to the verizon store.  i thought that we would consider making the switch from android to ios with the iphone 4s, but after talking about our options with kaela, we decided on upgrading to unlimited 4g data service with the 삼성 samsung galaxy nexus.  the store was selling it for $299, which was the same as verizon’s online price, but they didn’t have it in stock and only offered to order it to arrive in a couple of days; so we left the store and headed to the other santa clara verizon store on el camino real, near scott boulevard.  apparently, that store is more of an official verizon store.  we discovered that the price for the 삼성 galaxy nexus there was only $199!  wow, it was such a good thing that the other store was out of stock, or else we could have lost $200 right there!  well, we went ahead and bought the phones.  the salesguy chris was very nice and helpful.  i can tell that they work on commission and are told to sell as many accessories as possible, but he wasn’t annoying about it.  i couldn’t find any of the accessories that useful in my case (since i already have so many cell phone accessories), but i at least bought the screen protectors from him, mostly just to help him out as payback for his good service.

in the morning, i told my facebook friends that i was going to buy a new phone and was considering the iphone 4s. in the afternoon, i updated them with this picture to show that we had decided on the 삼성 samsung galaxy nexus (4g).

in the morning, i told my facebook friends that i was going to buy a new phone and was considering the iphone 4s. in the afternoon, i updated them with this picture to show that we had decided on the 삼성 samsung galaxy nexus (4g).

well, i went back to work after buying the phones.  then i came home after work.  i didn’t get to go to the gym or anything.  i wanted to go run on the treadmill or something, but at least i had made it to the 600a crossfit class at norcal crossfit san josé that day.  kaela told me to go to costco and buy a rotisserie chicken.  i bought that and some crimini mushrooms and organic strawberries for ewan.  i also bought some bananas for smoothies; some organic grape tomatoes; some organic, sliced colby jack cheese; and some fage greek yoghurt.  i brought the food home, and we ate the rotisserie chicken for dinner.  wow, it made such a big difference that i picked a chicken that was fresh out of the oven.  wow, it was so juicy on the inside yet crispy on the outside!

[later] on tuesday, i woke up on time and attended the 600a crossfit class at norcal crossfit san josé.  then, as usual; i came home, took care of ewan, cooked breakfast, etc.  then i went to work.  at lunch, i went home.  we ate the rest of the pack of carnitas that i bought from costco last week.  i had made guacamole in the morning and put it in the fridge for use at lunch.  after lunch, i went back to work.  after work, i went to 태권도 taekwondo practice at u.s. taekwondo academy.  practice ran a little late for some reason.  then i went home.  i picked up ewan from my dad’s house with sooni.  for dinner, i made some salmon salad; using canned, wild salmon; organic celery; organic granny smith apples; chopped, dried cranberries; sliced almonds; mayonnaise; and freshly ground black pepper.  it turned out pretty good.

my new 삼성 galaxy nexus (verizon 4g lte) has a 5 megapixel rear.facing camera and a simple 1.3 megapixel front.facing camera. the front.facing camera really amuses ewan. it's cool that i can now videochat from my phone. that seems so "futuristic."

my new 삼성 galaxy nexus (verizon 4g lte) has a 5 megapixel rear.facing camera and a simple 1.3 megapixel front.facing camera. the front.facing camera really amuses ewan. it's cool that i can now videochat from my phone. that seems so "futuristic."

on wednesday, i woke up on time again and went to my usual crossfit class.  then i came home and did the usual thing but also frantically tried to clean up the house.  kaela was so mad because ewan had made a mess with his trader joe’s 김 gim/kim (dried seaweed).  i tried to clean up his mess.  then i went to work.  at lunch; kaela picked me up with ewan, and we went to pho nam because kaela wanted to eat spring rolls.  since i can’t eat grains, i ordered the beef stew without any rice, noodles, or baguette.

while we ate lunch at pho nam yesterday, ewan got right to drumming with a pair of chopsticks. i wonder why kids so easily turn chopsticks into toys. well, hopefully they are more than toys in this case. i hope ewan has musical talent. that would be nice.

while we ate lunch at pho nam yesterday, ewan got right to drumming with a pair of chopsticks. i wonder why kids so easily turn chopsticks into toys. well, hopefully they are more than toys in this case. i hope ewan has musical talent. that would be nice.

[later] after lunch, i went back to work.  [later] then i met kaela at kaiser for a doctor’s appointment.  after work, i planned to go to sach’s wednesday, 700p turbo kickboxing (tkb) class at the east fremont avenue, sunnyvale 24 hour fitness sport; but kaela texted me just before i was getting ready to wrap things up at work.  she said that she didn’t feel good and wanted me to come straight home after picking up our raw milk delivery and dinner.  she does that to me all the time nowadays.

[later] 저녁 이지만 아직도 퇴근 안했어요: mornings usually start out great with crossfit.  then i come home and things sometimes keep going well.  sometimes, i manage to cook breakfast quickly and do my housechores quickly and then get to take ewan and sooni for a nice walk or something.  other times, things get really messy once i get home from crossfit… or they get messy.  sometimes, i’m given a bunch of extra, unnecessary work, which most often consists of being told to go find something that was misplaced in the house.  too often, i’m asked to find stuff in the house.  most of the time it’s stuff that isn’t all that hidden but just wasn’t very well looked for in the first place.  even though it’s quick to find that kind of stuff, it all adds up to a major annoyance since it can really throw off my schedule.  i hate when i’m rushing off late to some morning meeting.  if i get to go skateboarding during lunch, that’s great.  when that’s taken away from me, i lose my one chance to regather my sanity in the middle of the day.  [later] even though a crossfit workout of the day (wod) should give a crossfitter all the exercise that he or she needs for the day, because i am still a beginner or “newbie,” i can’t necessarily go as “all out” on my wod as the more experienced crossfitters because i need to practice my form on a lot of the exercises.  thus, i still want to go to 24 hour fitness on mondays and wednesdays and maybe thursdays to do other exercise like running on the treadmill or tkb.  i also want to go to taekwondo at least on tuesdays.  however, i’m often prevented from doing these things, which bums me out.  these days, kaela doesn’t really do any cooking or cleaning, so i need to devote more time to those things.  in the past, i would always cook breakfast.  lunch would be either kaela or me.  dinner was more often kaela’s thing although i of course sometimes cooked.  nowadays, all three meals are pretty much up to me.  and cleaning… well, i was doing most of the cleaning before anyway, but now i’m doing all of the cleaning.  i mean, sometimes clothes make their way to the washing machine without my help, but they don’t go much further than that.  [later] it’s late.  i’m still in my office.  i need to work on dj stuff, but kaela is telling me to come home to take her and ewan out to dinner.

this morning, i made it out to the usual crossfit class.  then i went home and did the usual stuff: cooking and cleaning and taking care of ewan.  then i went to work.  i had to go exchange my new 삼성 samsung galaxy nexus at the verizon store in the late morning when the store opened.  you see, it stopped charging last night and wouldn’t power up.  the exchange was quick and easy.  at lunchtime, i texted kaela to ask her what was happening but got no response.  i waited for a long time and then called her.  apparently, she went to lunch with her friend grace but didn’t tell me.  i was thus on my own for lunch.  i first hit up the sunnyvale skate park for just a quick skateboarding session.  then i went to the sunnyvale in.n.out and got to protein.style double.doubles with ketchup and mustard instead of sauce, grilled onions, and extra produce.  then i went back to work.  in the late afternoon, i had to head out to joy luck palace in cupertino village (the cupertino 99 ranch mall) for a dj site visit for this saturday’s wedding.  then i went back to work.  now, i need to rush home.

tonight, i didn't get to hit the gym after work or anything. at first, kaela wanted me to take the family out to dinner; but when she came home from work, she told me to cook lobster tails and green beans.

tonight, i didn't get to hit the gym after work or anything. at first, kaela wanted me to take the family out to dinner; but when she came home from work, she told me to cook lobster tails and green beans.

Posted in dining, dj, dj business, ewan, family, food, hole-in-wall dining, parenting, skateboarding, technology | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

kind of like the beginning of 2011년10월 but with a lot more work

Posted on 2012년April월20일, Friday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월20일, 금요일 오후: it’s friday, the end of one really exhausting week.  i’ve been getting worked very hard at work, and i’ve also been working myself hard in many ways.  i made it to crossfit monday through thursday.  i took today off.  i also did that extra gym workout at the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport on wednesday evening.  i went skateboarding at lunch on wednesday, thursday, and today.  i went to the 530p class at norcal crossfit yesterday evening and then hit up brent’s garage mini.ramp in campbell for more skateboarding after that.  then, i came home and worked on dj stuff until about 400a.  i only got about 4.5 hours of sleep last night.

this end of this week is like those days at the beginning of 2011년10월 (october 2011) when the beautiful kaela hwang left town, took ewan down to socal, dropped him off with her parents, and then went on that chiropractic missions trip to mexico.  during those days, i also squeezed in a lot of skateboarding, did a lot of dj stuff, and got a decent amount of exercise.  however, these few days are different because i have a lot more work.  when i was just djing the word on the streeatz food truck party, it wasn’t nearly as much work as djing a wedding, and i’m now going to be djing two weddings in a row!

for lunch today, i made guacamole and ate it with some carnitas from costco and some organic romaine lettuce from trader joe's. i tried to get some dj work done during lunch.

for lunch today, i made guacamole and ate it with some carnitas from costco and some organic romaine lettuce from trader joe's. i tried to get some dj work done during lunch.

Posted in cooking, dj, dj business, skateboarding, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

105th wedding monthversary, 147th monthversary of being together

Posted on 2012년April월19일, Thursday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월19일, 목요일 아침: last night, i spotted an interesting article in my google news feed, but i didn’t get to finish reading it until this morning:

“the downside of cohabiting before marriage” by meg jay, published in the new york times on 2012년04월14일

this morning, i was trying to find that article via a search in google news, but first only came up with articles that were written in response to the original:

apparently, i have arrived on this topic really late; but the reference authors all arrived on this topic late.  the controversy over cohabitation is nothing new at all.  i have been hearing it in church for at least the past decade or so.  i mean… i guess i only returned to church after the beautiful kaela hwang and i got married, but there was a big, relevant reason for that: i’ve honestly been a bit shy at times to mention in the church crowd (even to this day) that kaela and i cohabitated before marriage.  honestly, at times, when telling some church friends about our history, i hoped that they wouldn’t notice a time gap in my narrative.  cohabitation is a bit controversial, and even the idea of couples traveling on overnight trips without others (friends or family) is also controversial.  as much as i insist that the “christian church” today is not the ridiculously conservative institution that the so.called “liberal” atheist keep trying to paint it as, i have to admit that i notice that in most asian.american, evangelical church communities issues that touch upon premarital sex are still sticky when it comes to actual real, live people in one’s own circle of “christian” friends.  still, the modern christian church is not that screwed up and understands biblical forgiveness in a modern world.  for example, i have heard pastors say that they will perform weddings for couples and have them go through premarital counseling in which the pastor will ask if the couple has been cohabitating or traveling alone together (i.e. traveling together without anyone else in the party).  if the couples has, then the pastor will basically say something like “that’s okay; but from now until your wedding, i don’t want you to cohabitate or travel alone together.”  sure, that’s not a message borne out of the sexual revolution.  however, we really live a post.post.modern world.  this is no longer the 1960s.  i personally aim to subvert the dominate paradigm and tear down all preconceptions of “liberal” versus “conservative.”

i really don’t know how long i have heard in the church community (via sermons, bible studies, etc.) that cohabitation before marriage is not a good idea and that the population of couples that cohabitate before marriage have a higher divorce rate.  i’m pretty sure i heard it back in the days before i was married, like when i was in college.  my gut feeling is that if i had been “plugged in” to a church community at the time when kaela and i moved in together, we might not have done so at the time.  however, part of why kaela and i connected so well right off the bat was that we found ourselves in very similar spiritual situations: we both had been in church communities in the past, but we were both a bit burned out and confused.  to this day, i’m simply so happy that we met a friendly pastor and his wife while on our honeymoon in korea and that their words and actions showed a compassion and forgiveness that was so true to the teachings of jesus.  that encounter was enough to bring us both back to church.  at one point, for the sake of insurance or some other benefit which might have been something so trivial as a discount on membership to the martial arts program, i lightheartedly suggested to kaela doing an official “domestic partnership” since heterosexual couples can do that, not just homasexual couples.  however, in the end, i popped “the question” soon enough, and we were en route to making it really official.

[later] 오후: most of the articles and blog posts that were written in response to the original article want to “stick up” for cohabitation.  the daily beast article was the most defensive and took the whole stance of “it’s those d@mn conservative christians against ‘us.’”  that author acts as if the original author totally bashed cohabitation, when that totally not true.  rather, the original author rather objectively pointed out flaws in the way young people go about cohabitation.  she concludes her response with the following: “as for downsides of living together, they pretty much mirror what they are for marriage.  for women, more housework and more calories.  for men, well, like with marriage, it’s pretty much all upside.”  i’m sure she’s just joking; but, man, i’m honestly almost “offended.”  do you realise how much time i spend every single morning on housework?!  again, i’m sure she’s just joking, but it makes me so mad when people perpetuate the false stereotype that modern men are like the men of yesteryear and don’t do at least their fair share of housework and parenting.  if you remember, a few days ago, i posted a link to an article about facebooks coo (chief operating officer / chief operations officer) sheryl sandberg: “5 ways to close the ‘ambition gap’ for girls” by samantha ettus on forbes.com on 2012년02월02일.  in that article, the author says that one big problem in gender relations today is that “working moms are apologizing” for working.  well, you know what?  there’s a huge flipside.  a big problem in corporate relations today is that working dads are apologizing for being dads!  i’m so sick of this $#!+ about how if you’re not working at least 90 hours a week then you simply don’t have passion for your job and no company needs that kind of “passionless” worker.  it’s such b.s.

anyway, the other two “response” articles are more objective.  they mostly clarify what the original author said and emphasise that the author never said cohabitation for marriage is certain doom, but that young couples need to do it right.  doing it right includes not taking the decision lightly but treating it as a big deal something “ceremonious.”  young couples need to realise better just how hard it is to get out of a cohabitative situation.  it can’t be just for the money (savings).  it can’t be just for convenience.  it must be based on true, deep, meaningful love.

what is my opinion of all this?  well, as i kind of allude to earlier, this article is a bit less accusing than what i’ve heard in the past amongst the more conservative, asian.american church crowd, which can sometimes treat cohabitation before marriage as such a scandal, which i’ll admit even though i refuse to let those belligerent, anti.christian atheists get away with saying all christians hold such views.  i won’t go as far as to take the humanist’s relatively wishy.washy but dangerous viewpoint of “oh, as long as the two people love each other, nothing is a sin.”  (it was so easy to get sucked into the ways of the religion of humanism in the environment i found myself in during my last years in berkeley.)  as nice as that sounds, that’s not true, but neither is that the point.  it goes back to my rant on how the media loves to keep jabbing christianity in the ribs with the gay marriage issue: sure, the bible says in “literal” terms that homosexuality is a sin, but so are a lot of things; so the whole  fight against gay marriage is just a mean.spirited exercise in all that is non.beneficial.  do you serve the lord through that?  do you win people to his kingdom through that?  obviously not! it’s all legalism especially in the sense that a heterosexual person might have all sorts of perverted and twisted desires and practices, but two homosexual people that simply love each other enough to want to make an official commitment get so bashed.  similarly, why keep poking at (heterosexual, mature) couples that really love each other deeply and cohabitate or even engage in premarital, sexual relations?  sure, it’s not ideal according to the bible; but we as a community of followers of jesus could use our energy for other things that would give so much more glory to god.  forgive, have compassion, move on.

all that being said, let’s consider how i’m now a parent.  i have a son.  furthermore, what if i someday have a daughter?  how would i feel about a son or daughter “shacking up” with a significant other before marriage?  you know, i was talking to a much older coworker back in 2001년, and i was telling him about how kaela and i were moving into a new apartment together.  actually, he was my manager at the time, not just a coworker.  he might have simply asked me how my weekend was, or i might have asked for something like time off to move or employment verification for the property management company or something like that.  anyway, i was speaking as one adult to another; but i came upon a realisation during the conversation.  he asked something like, “are you getting married?”  i said that we weren’t yet getting married.  he then asked, “so you’re just ‘shacking up’ together?”  i hadn’t thought about that term before he said it.  then i remembered that he had a daughter that was just a little younger than i was at the time.  i’m felt confident that he approved of my character as an engineer and his direct report.  however, i realised that, in his mind, at at that moment, he was worried about if his daughter would ever want to live with a guy before marriage.  well, what if i were in that situation right there, if i were the dad of a son or daughter that was about to “shack up” with a significant other?

i hate to admit my male chauvenism or sexism, but i honestly think i would worry more if it were a daughter.  in all honesty and openness, i’ll admit that i can’t help but succumb at times to the notion that a guy’s manhood are dictated by 1) his relationship, i.e. to his wife or girlfriend etc. and 2) the relationship of his daughter if he has any.  i don’t think i’m turning this into a total elektra complex thing, but wouldn’t you say society has a notion that a girl picks her man/guy/husband at least somewhat based upon the characteristics she likes or dislikes about her father?  while hearing in my head all the “father daughter dance” songs i’ve played at weddings over the many years, i think about how a lot of dads probably think, “if my daughter picks a husband that is similar to me, she must like me.  if my daughter picks a husband that is nothing like me, then she must hate me.”  of course, it’s pure nonsense; but, you know, guys are vulnerable to those kinds of insecurities.

in any case, son or daughter; i would want my kids to think of cohabitation as something almost as serious as marriage although i want them to treat marriage as the most serious relationship and commitment.  i want them to treat it as something more serious than just “going out” or dating (obviously), something more serious than just “being in a serious relationship,” and, well, for lack of a euphemism something more serious than “just” being in a “sexual relationship.”  as pleasantville as people would want to say i am with all the bible this, jesus that; i do live in the real world.

how about myself and my past?  how do i feel about cohabitation in my past.  well, i’ll say this: i’m glad that the only girlfriend that i ever cohabitated with is the one i married.  today is our 105th monthversary.  ironically, we don’t get to spend it together under the same roof since kaela is off in south carolina for her chiropractic seminar.

i rarely eat lunch out by myself. since kaela's out of town, i ate lunch today at panera bread, hoping to get a salad to fit my grain.free diet and get some dj work done. i wish i had told them to leave the wonton strips out of my thai chicken salad. my macbook wouldn't connect to their wifi even though my htc incredible android phone connected fine. the strawberry smoothie was good but probably too sugary.

i rarely eat lunch out by myself. since kaela's out of town, i ate lunch today at panera bread, hoping to get a salad to fit my grain.free diet and get some dj work done. i wish i had told them to leave the wonton strips out of my thai chicken salad. my macbook wouldn't connect to their wifi even though my htc incredible android phone connected fine. the strawberry smoothie was good but probably too sugary.

i spotted this article in my google news feed today: “popular sunnyvale nightclub owner killed sj murder-suicide” by chris roberts on nbcbayarea.com on 2012년04월19일.  emma nguyen was the owner of the abyss nightclub in downtown sunnyvale.  a bunch of us took kaela to that club on her birthday a few years back.  *sigh* just another example of why guns are not ideal.

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breathe carolina

Posted on 2012년April월18일, Wednesday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월18일, 수요일 점심: i made it out to the sunnyvale skate park today for a decent lunchtime skateboarding session with warm, sunny weather.  i’m wearing new shoes today, a pair of black and grey dvses (i supposed that’s how i’ll pluralise “dvs.”)  i figure i might was well start wearing these new shoes that i’ve had for a very, very long time.  with shoe goop (fake shoe goo) i made my grey etnies fader vulcs last almost a full year.  i started wearing them in 2011년05월 may of last year, just as we left for our trip to maui.  right now, i’m in my office cubicle, eating a salad from the corporate cafeteria.

this morning, i woke up in time for the 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé.  this week has been a serious win as far as fitness and exercise: three great crossfit workouts in a row, taekwondo practice last night, and a couple of good lunchtime skateboarding sessions.  if only i had made it out to the gym on monday night to do a little extra work like running on the treadmill or just extra training for the tough mudder…  but no biggie!  i’m totally satisfied with how this week is going as far as exercise and fitness.  honestly, i may have to scale back on the exercise and fitness activity soon and simply focus on more dj activities.  i do after all have two weddings to dj this weekend.  it’s going to be a busy next few days!

well, the beautiful kaela hwang flew off to south carolina today.  well, she’s most likely still on her way.  she drove herself to sfo (san francisco international airport) this morning.  she had a voucher for a free week of long.term parking there.  my mom came and picked up ewan and brought him to his swim class.  i’m sure he’s having a lot of fun with her today.  after everyone left, i quickly took sooni for a skateboard walk on my santa cruz homer one cruiser setup before heading off to work.

here's a candid shot: kaela kissed ewan goodbye as he left with his ah.ma to his swim class and she left for her trip to south carolina.

here's a candid shot: kaela kissed ewan goodbye as he left with his ah.ma to his swim class and she left for her trip to south carolina.

[later] 저녁 이지만 아직도 퇴근 안했어요: well, i made it out to the sunnyvale skate park at lunchtime today for a nice skateboarding session, as i said.  [later] otherwise, it has been yet another busy day at work.  *sigh* so much work, and i often feel like i’m being pulled in so many different directions.  i really think that i’ll make it to sach’s wednesday, 700p turbo kickboxing class tonight at the east fremont avenue, sunnyvale 24 hour fitness.  [just a little later] oh, crud!  however, i see that sach is not teaching tonight.  supposedly, there’s a sub named “debbie c.”  i don’t know if i want to take the risk of her being a not.so.good instructor.  i wonder what happened to sach.  [later] i guess i might just hit up the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport and run on the treadmill a little or something like that.  i figure i’ll cook 삼겹살 samgyuhbsal for dinner tonight.  sometimes ewan likes that.  he just calls it “bacon.”  we’ll see if he likes it tonight.  sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn’t.

last night, we actually ate some 삼겹살 samgyuhbsal along with other grilled meats at 토방 tobang.  we went out to dinner after taekwondo practice, and kaela joined us.  the table shared a grilled meat combination, but i also ordered some 버섯 불고기 buhsuht boolgogi (mushroom boolgogi) for ewan since he loves mushrooms so much.  at 토방 tobang, they make it with 표고 pyogo (shiitake mushrooms).

one article i read today: “how exercise could lead to a better brain” by gretchen reynolds, published in the new york times on 2012년04월18일.

[later] i believe that after i put ewan to bed tonight, i’ll need to stay up late and work on dj stuff.  i won’t be able attend tomorrow’s 600a crossfit class anyway, since i am not supposed to leave ewan alone in the house, you know?  i’ll try to go to one of the afternoon/evening classes instead.  then, again, i’ll probably need to stay up late and work on dj stuff on thursday night.  friday? *shrug* who knows?  i obviously can’t go to the early morning crossfit class.  i’ll think about going to one of the afternoon/evening classes.  i’ll try not to stay up too late, working on dj stuff on friday night.  back in college, toward my latter years, i made a rule: i can pull all.nighters up to two nights before an exam, but i must not pull an all.nighter the night just before an exam.  nowadays, i take that rule and apply it to djing events such as weddings.

[later] 737p: i’m at the sunnyvale 24 hour fitness super sport, stretching after running for about three and a half miles on the treadmill. i don’t know what to do next here, but i’ll need to shower soon and then go pick up our raw milk delivery.

[later] 밤, 1045p: i’m at home, working on some dj stuff for this weekend’s weddings.  i’m getting stuff done, but i have so much more stuff to get done, so… i need to stay motivated.  when i came home from the gym, ewan was at my dad’s house.  i walked with sooni over to pick him up but found that he had fallen asleep in my dad’s arms.  my dad said he would carry ewan back to our house and that i should just walk back first with sooni.  when he got to our house, he explained that ewan had played with mason and nolan all afternoon.  my mom told me that he only took a short nap because he was so excited to play with mason and nolan.  when my dad carried him over, i put him right into the crib.  it’s good that he went to sleep early; but i just worry that he’ll wake up super early, basically in the middle of the night.  i don’t know whether to stick to the plan of working on dj stuff late into the night or instead to take a nap now to prepare for if ewan wakes up in the middle of the night.  *sigh*

via foursquare and google latitude i see that kaela is still driving from the airport to her final destination of myrtle beach, south carolina.  she told me it would be a four.hour drive.  monitoring her progress on that drive is making me so nervous.  she’s all the way on the other side of the country in a state that is probably nothing like california.  i can’t believe she’s doing all this for this chiropractic seminar.  [later] 1100p: a little while ago, i saw that kaela posted on facebook that she arrived at her hotel before 200a edt (easter daylight time).  when i saw that, i immediately called her.  [later] 1150p: seriously, i can’t believe she’s going through all of this just for this chiropractic seminar.

i told myself that i would work on dj stuff until midnight and then go to sleep.  it’s scary though; i just heard ewan cry out a little from his room.  if he wakes up at midnight; then i might not sleep tonight, and i might not get any more work finished.  this is scary!

Posted in ewan, exercise, family, food, parenting, skateboarding | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

meals, wheels, deals

Posted on 2012년April월17일, Tuesday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월17일; 화요일 아침, 742a: i am currently sitting on the floor of ewan’s bedroom with my back against the side of his crib as he slowly wakes up.  i mean… he’s awake, but he hasn’t yet gotten up.  i’m currently eating a blueberry, banana, and almond smoothie.  i made one like this yesterday morning too.  today is tuesday.  it’s going to be a busy day, but i want to make it a good one.  well, god help me… please.

i made it to the 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé today.  yesterday’s workout was perhaps the most brutal crossfit wod i’ve done so far, but today’s was also pretty tough.  i don’t know if you realise it or not, but at norcal crossfit, i’m getting coached and instructed by some really big names in crossfit.  this is not unlike how i trained in taekwondo at cal.  yesterday, our instructor/coach was the famous jason khalipa that owns norcal crossfit; but i’ve come to realise that our usual instructor pat barber is also a really big name in the sport.

[later] yes, it’s a busy day so far.  boy, oh boy!

[later] 저녁 이지만 아직도 퇴근 안했어요:  well, i didn’t get to hit up the sunnyvale skate park for any skateboarding today, and that is just plain wrong and unacceptable.  i spent my lunchtime as a lunch delivery boy.  the beautiful kaela hwang told me to get her a #4 chicken sandwich from lee’s sandwiches and shrimp spring rolls.  i didn’t think i’d find any food for myself and my grain.free diet at lee’s.  on my way out to lee’s though, i spotted the mogo korean bbq taco truck parked at the lowe’s home improvement store by my office.  i quickly pulled over and bought myself the usual triplet of tortilla.free tacos: 닭구이, 갈비, 돼지 불고기 – dalkgooi, galbi, dwaeji boolgogi (chicken, short rib, and pork).  then i continued to lee’s sandwich to buy kaela’s food.  i saw that they do indeed sell some grain.free options: i spotted some chicken skewers.  i asked the man behind the counter for the price, and he said $1.75 each, so i bought two of those.  they also sell packs of barbequed chicken drumsticks.  now, i know.  i brought the food home, and we had a feast for lunch… a very silicon valley feast: lee’s sandwiches and mogo are both very silicon valley food establishments.  ewan enjoyed my tortilla.free tacos with me.  we watched some kbs dream high 2 while eating.

ewan enjoyed my tortilla.free korean barbeque tacos from mogo. he can be cool with protein.style.

ewan enjoyed my tortilla.free korean barbeque tacos from mogo. he can be cool with protein.style.

after lunch, i rushed back to work.  then i headed back to our neighbourhood in the mid afternoon to meet a buyer for my car at wheels n’ deals.  we took my car for a smog check.  it passed, and he bought it!  woohoo!  i sold it to him for $2,300.  i had to pay wheels n’ deals $298 as commission, and i already paid them $99 to rent the spot on their sales lot.  i ended up paying $50 for the smog check today on top of the $24 i paid for the first smog check.  thus, i netted $1,829 from this sale, which is less than my original asking price but still more than i could have gotten from anyone on craigslist.  overall, i’m pleased with my experience at wheels n’ deals.  it’s much better than selling on craigslist.

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i think crossfit is really helping my skateboarding

Posted on 2012년April월16일, Monday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월16일; 월요일 저녁, 642p: this morning, i woke up in time to attend the 600a class at norcal crossfit san josé.  jason khalipa led the class.  he’s the famous competitive crossfit athlete that owns all the norcal crossfit boxes.  it was a tough workout.  jason said that our location hosted a competition this past weekend, so it had all the weights and kettlebells from all the other norcal boxes, and he wanted to keep the wod uniform for all the boxes, so today’s wod used no weights or kettlebells (just body weight and unloaded barbell bars), but it was tough!

it was very interesting to meet jason khalipa.  he’s a buff guy but surprisingly energetic for his level of buffness.  that’s obviously the difference between crossfit and bodybuilding or plain weightlifting.  he also swears a lot more than i expected, and i noticed that other people swear more when they’re around him.  i don’t casually swear like that.  i only swear when i’m genuinely pi$$ed or frustrated.  when i’m at the skate park, i’m usually around guys who casually swear, but i still don’t casually swear when i’m with them.

well, i made it to the sunnyvale skate park for a nice lunchtime skateboarding session on this warm, sunny day.  i hadn’t gone skateboarding in ages but skateboarded better than i expected and felt surprisingly comfortable.  i think crossfit is really helping my skateboarding!  my ollies and nollies were surprisingly higher, and my landings were more stable.  i felt more agile than i expected, especially for having taken so much time off.

at the end of dimsum at china stix yesterday after church at grx, ewan played with his leaptop. actually, he first asked me to take a picture of it (above). then he had me take a picture of him with it (below). i want to share this picture on facebook with some caption about how ewan worked through his lunch.

at the end of dimsum at china stix yesterday after church at grx, ewan played with his leaptop. actually, he first asked me to take a picture of it (above). then he had me take a picture of him with it (below). i want to share this picture on facebook with some caption about how ewan worked through his lunch.

at dimsum at china stix yesterday, we ordered shrimp.stuffed mushrooms, steamed tripe, ha.gow, seafood dumplings, shrimp rice rolls, gai lan, and more shrimp.stuffed mushrooms because ewan was so into those shrimp.stuffed mushrooms. he kept wanting more.

at dimsum at china stix yesterday, we ordered shrimp.stuffed mushrooms, steamed tripe, ha.gow, seafood dumplings, shrimp rice rolls, gai lan, and more shrimp.stuffed mushrooms because ewan was so into those shrimp.stuffed mushrooms. he kept wanting more.

here are a couple of shots of ewan playing with his "bristle blocks" last night. he always says that he wants to build an "airplane" with them.

here are a couple of shots of ewan playing with his "bristle blocks" last night. he always says that he wants to build an "airplane" with them.

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it look clean, don’t it?

Posted on 2012년April월14일, Saturday by 황명록 beno hwang

2012년04월14일; 토요일 아침, 709a: earlier this morning, i woke up from a dream in which i returned home from some far away plane trip.  i had some friend with me.  i forget who it was.  anyway, we walked into my house, and there was an al qaeda terrorist with a machine gun.  i forget what happened, but my friend and i ran in different directions in the house and hid.  while hiding, i watched some old movie via netflix on my phone.  later, i snuck out of the house.  i was running around town somewhere.  eventually, i found a cop and told him that an al qaeda terrorist was in my house.  he asia he knew that a group of al qaeda terrorists had attacked the.neighbourhood but that it was under control, that the terrorists were failing miserably.  i went back to my house, which was now a big hotel.  i wandered around.  i think, at some point, i was at my old middle school and then at a shopping mall.  i think there was some skateboarding involved at some point.  i remember ollieing off a small stairset.  also, i remember talking to someone else that had encountered one of the al qaeda terrorists.  he said the terrorist offered him a fake five dollar as a bribe for him to join their side.  i think the face on the fake bill was that alfred e. newman from mad magazine.  what a weird dream?  does this maybe have something to do with that interaction on twitter with those loser gun nuts this week?

[later] 916a: ah, it feels good to be wearing clean clothes today.  for once, everything that i am wearing is freshly washed.  that’s very rare.  i like it.  since i’m not buying new clothes this year, we need to do laundry more often.  i have a few articles of clothing that i do need to retire.  i hope i can survive this year without shopping for clothes.  once again, i’ll say that i’m making exceptions for clothes that are really needed for exercise, snowboarding, skateboarding, or djing.  so far, i haven’t made much use of those exceptions except for some new gym clothes.  i haven’t bought new skateboarding shoes in ages.  i’m making my current pairs last a very long time thanks to shoe goo.  i want to take ewan to the sunnyvale skate park soon to squeeze in some skateboarding before gymboree.  the beautiful kaela hwang bought cirque du soleil tickets for this afternoon.  i have a wedding dj site visit before that, after lunch.  it will be a full day.  at least i have a fresh, clean outfit on!

originally, i wanted to take ewan out to the sunnyvale skate park but we got sidetracked with walking sooni. after gymboree, we ate a hurried lunch at amici's east coast pizzeria. ewan napped in the car while i did my wedding dj site visit of cinnabar hills golf club. then he spent the rest of the afternoon at his ah.ma's house while kaela and i watch cirque du soleil totem. then we reunited for dinner at the almaden sonoma chicken coop.

originally, i wanted to take ewan out to the sunnyvale skate park but we got sidetracked with walking sooni. after gymboree, we ate a hurried lunch at amici's east coast pizzeria. ewan napped in the car while i did my wedding dj site visit of cinnabar hills golf club. then he spent the rest of the afternoon at his ah.ma's house while kaela and i watch cirque du soleil totem. then we reunited for dinner at the almaden sonoma chicken coop.

in case you’re clueless about popular hip.hop music, the title of today’s post is a line from the song “young, wild, & free” by wiz khalifa and snoop dogg featuring bruno mars.

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