Jonathan's Maxims to Wisdom and Happiness

1. Lie, Cheat, Steal, all in moderation. Lie in the freshly cut grass of a park on a sunny day. Cheat death by living young. Steal time for those who place high importance on time spent with you.

2. Make mistakes regularly-- they are the cure-all for a bad case of ostentatiousness, but make sure that the same mistake doesn't humble you too much.

3. Live on the edge. Those who stay against the walls and corners will never see the sunset from a balcony.

4. Laugh at somethingthat no one else laughs at, once a day. It's good for the immune system.

5. Eat brussel sprouts, even if you don't like 'em.

6. Honor your parents and respect them. Care for them and love them. Thank them for the greatest gift of all: life.

7. The Glass is always half full, dammit! There's no use running on empty.

8. Consider the water skeeter: Always swim upstream. Slow traffic stay to the right.

9. Take note of something simple every day of your life and analyze it to hell. It could be a shoe, or pen; maybe even a leaf or blade of grass. Pick it apart as if it were Moby Dick or War and Peace.

10. Listen to Silence. Taste Bitterness. Smell Fulfillment. See Wisdom. Touch hearts.

11. Hang from a tree like a monkey once in a while. It's a barrel of fun.