bb’s babblings

i had this conversation with a friend, ep, teaching me a dance move last night. i was totally picturing that scene from class act when kid or play, whoever it was, was teaching the nerdy one how to dance and he looked like a bird flopping his arms around.. you know what i’m talking bout

bb: am i doing it right?
ep: umm, try like this. it’s a little different. more in the hips and knees
bb: like this?
ep: it’s like when you’re doing a girl doggy style
…
ep: that’s how you do doggy style?
bb: man. it’s been too long.

dude, this is making me worry. on one hand i want to move to la or ny, it seems like it’d be so much easier there, but i have a feeling that change must start from within. changing the city won’t matter if i’m not more confident and social… right now it’s at a strange point, in dancing… chilling there watching the circle and really feeling it, but i won’t go in, and people are like bust out, and i just won’t, not enough balls and not enough skills… but it’s wierd because like why chill by the circle if not busting out, you know, why not just dance in the crowd or alone or why not just watch at home. i dunno, dance and drawing, it’s strange because it’s such an internal thing yet at the same time it’s all external too… man, i’m so feeling this house mix on netmusique.com and i so don’t want to write this paper. every once in a while i gather enough courage to actually go in and bust out, but usually i hesitate, and then some goofy drunk white guy goes in and litters, and then i’m all scared of looking like him. it’s like that in all of life though. gotta go for it before that inspiration/confidence/vibe kisses you by the ear and runs away… man, i’m really digging this mix.