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        riddles >> general problem-solving / chatting / whatever >> You are in denial
        
(Message started by: Grimbal on Aug 6^th, 2010, 7:47am)

Title: You are in denial
Post by Grimbal on Aug 6^th, 2010, 7:47am

Just wondering.

What would be the best response when someone says: "You are in denial!"?

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by SMQ on Aug 6^th, 2010, 8:02am

If it's a casual thing, "I think you're confusing disagreement with denial."

But if it's a serious (i.e. life-altering) thing, and the statement is from a friend, "Then convince me: lay out the evidence and we'll look at it together." We humans have a fairly large capacity for self-deception, and if it's a serious charge being put forth by someone whose opinion matters, it's always worth at least examining the possibility that one really is in denial and others are seeing what we ourselves cannot.

--SMQ

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by rmsgrey on Aug 6^th, 2010, 9:00am

First thought:

"No I'm not"

Follow up:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQFKtI6gn9Y

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by Grimbal on Aug 6^th, 2010, 9:56am

I remember this from a movie, where a psychiatrist asked that question in order to destabilize the patient. So it was in with the idea of "how to fight back?".

Now that I think of it, "no" is a perfectly logical answer in all cases.
- Suppose you agree with the psychiatrist. So you are in denial and you should respond accordingly by denying it. You know it is false, but you are in denial, right?
- If you disagree, you should respond accordingly and truthfully say "no".

Saying "yes" would be a paradox of the type "I am a liar". To some this would be a good reason to answer "yes".

The problem is that the answer "no" seems to contradict your own answer. You cannot say "no" if you are not in denial. You might feel you got trapped in a dead end. But in fact you are not. SMQ gives the solution by noting that the answer "no" is not a denial but a disagreement.

So in fact it is not so much of a problem question. Just to be clear, you can say "You have the right to think that, and I have the right to disagree".

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by ThudanBlunder on Aug 6^th, 2010, 12:43pm

on 08/06/10 at 09:56:27, Grimbal wrote:

Just to be clear, you can say "You have the right to think that, and I have the right to disagree".

Or http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oz8RjPAD2Jk&feature=related

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by towr on Aug 6^th, 2010, 2:32pm

It really depends a lot on the situation. But if it is in the context of a fact-based debate, then you could just point out (if it's true) that the evidence does not support that assertion, and present said evidence.

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by Mickey1 on Nov 22^nd, 2010, 2:09am

It is an interesting question, in one context, namely that of phychoanalysis. In a standard Freudian analysis, it relates to the period when the patient starts to accepts the analyst's suggestions, i.e. the suggested reason why the patient developed the problem for which he/she seeked help. The first reaction is supposed to be (strong) denial, followed by stepwise acceptance.

The jargon allows the user of the argument to play the supposedly neutral doctor, only seeking to assist a confused patient. An answer could be something like "if you were a shrink, I wouldn't consult you".

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by Grimbal on Dec 1^st, 2010, 7:01am

I think I have a nice way to say "no":
"This is something I can hardly agree with you, isn't it?"

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by JiNbOtAk on Dec 2^nd, 2010, 6:06am

on 12/01/10 at 07:01:05, Grimbal wrote:

I think I have a nice way to say "no":
"This is something I can hardly agree with you, isn't it?"

But it'd be more satisfying to respond with, "What da F**K ??" ;D

Title: Re: You are in denial
Post by BenVitale on Dec 8^th, 2010, 12:15pm

There are many researchers who have and are working in the field of the development of mental defenses. One of them is Prof. Phebe Cramer (http://www.williams.edu/Psychology/Faculty/Cramer/cramer). She described 3 levels of defense:

- Denial
- Projection
- Identification

She has developed a method of measuring psychological defenses : the Thematic Apperception Test (http://web.utk.edu/~wmorgan/tat/tattxt.htm)

More info in wiki
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thematic_Apperception_Test