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   Author  Topic: bill gates bathroom  (Read 34006 times)
Franklinstein
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bill gates bathroom  
« on: Jul 27th, 2002, 8:58pm »
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You have been assigned to design Bill Gates bathroom. Naturally, cost is not a consideration. You may not speak to Bill.  
 
I would put an instant teller machine next to the throne so Bill can wipe his arse with C-notes.  Grin
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #1 on: Jul 27th, 2002, 10:19pm »
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probably wouldnt work as i heard c-notes are a bit rough on the behind Smiley
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Matthew Schultheis
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Re: bill gates bathroom_  
« Reply #2 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 9:57am »
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Easy, ask his wife.
 
-Matthew Schultheis
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pqlier
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #3 on: Aug 7th, 2002, 9:16am »
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I'd cost-cut like crazy, use recycled materials that I claimed I bought new, charge a fortune and pocket the difference; make sure the room has lots of odd nooks and crannies that are impossible to keep clean and that the seals on the sewer line are none too good, that the john is just that little bit too high and that the seat cover won't stay open when you stand and flops forward on your back when you sit, and leave a leaflet on the floor outlining the end-user licence agreement and noting that the current theme can be easily changed but not explaining how.
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Aaron
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #4 on: Aug 8th, 2002, 11:44pm »
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Let's see....
 
- a toilet that clogs often, and clears when you pull n the seat cover, lift the tank top, and flush at the same time.
 
- an EULA printed on the toilet lid stating that, by opening the lid, he agrees to the terms of the agreement.
 
- a mirror that show a blue background and the text "general protection fault" when you try to look into it.
 
- countless hidden entrances.
 
I'd think up more, but it's a couple hours past my bed time and I can't really think straight now. -_-;
 
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Pietro K.C.
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #5 on: Sep 3rd, 2002, 7:42pm »
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Since cost is not a consideration, hire the best bathroom designer there is. Find out who he/she is on Google or whatever.  Grin
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James Fingas
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #6 on: Sep 6th, 2002, 11:31am »
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I would never consider taking on a design task without knowing the design requirements. It is essential to 'connect' with the user both before and during any design process!
 
[/suckup]
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Jeremiah Smith
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #7 on: Sep 6th, 2002, 7:13pm »
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on Sep 6th, 2002, 11:31am, James Fingas wrote:
I would never consider taking on a design task without knowing the design requirements. It is essential to 'connect' with the user both before and during any design process!
 
[/suckup]

 
You're hired, man.
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jon_G
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #8 on: Dec 4th, 2002, 9:26pm »
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I would design the bathroom with a system very much similar to that of a normal pc with windows 98 and make him have to shut down the lights or toilet just like a computer. And if he doesn't he'll have to have a large blue screen(of death) that says he shut down the bathroom improperly and has to check for viruses(in this case ecolie). Then to top it off I would put a Macintosh users manual by the toilet along with an aray of hunting,fishing,sports magazines. Then I would look for another job. Oh and every time he flushed the toilet it would go cha ching cha ching. Wink
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #9 on: Jan 1st, 2003, 8:09am »
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on Sep 6th, 2002, 11:31am, James Fingas wrote:
I would never consider taking on a design task without knowing the design requirements. It is essential to 'connect' with the user both before and during any design process!
 
[/suckup]

 
A very nice answer, James!
 
How about this:
- OK, cost is not an issue, but there are other things to consider:
* Water inlets / outlets
* Design of other rooms / bathrooms
* Water pump preasure of the house
etc.
 
 
BNC
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Grimbal
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #10 on: May 1st, 2004, 9:32am »
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on Jul 27th, 2002, 8:58pm, Franklinstein wrote:
Naturally, cost is not a consideration.

 
Then I would charge a lot.  The rest is not important.
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King_T
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #11 on: May 30th, 2004, 9:10pm »
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Aside from the usual electronic gadgetry, I'd ensure that it had a microphone hooked up to a computer to analyze the following:
 
hears zipper first => puts seat up
 
hears belt buckle first => puts seat down
 
hears "back teeth floating", "meet a man about a horse",  etc => puts seat up
 
hears "oh no" or "tequila" => puts seat down, locks door, plays loud music, cools seat around forehead area, starts refreshing water spray onto face, starts air blast to keep long hair up out of the bowl, autoflushes every 30 seconds, periodically kicks your butt
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RollyF
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #12 on: Aug 8th, 2004, 12:02am »
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I charge Bill a fortune; outsource the job to India or China; and laugh all the way to the bank.
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bishwa
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #13 on: Aug 16th, 2004, 3:21pm »
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on Aug 7th, 2002, 9:16am, pqlier wrote:
... and leave a leaflet on the floor outlining the end-user licence agreement and noting that the current theme can be easily changed but not explaining how.

 
Surely you meant "Leave a leaflet outside outlining EULA and that opening the door invalidates any warranty or right to for reimbursal.
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a cree
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #14 on: Nov 19th, 2004, 6:53pm »
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How would I design a bathroom for Bill Gates?
 
I would install the plumbing and porcelain for free.  
 
I would charge for the privilege to customize the toliet seat, the fixtures and the tiles.  
 
And I would make sure that the toilet and toilet paper only worked with the proprietary brand of water and paper that I controlled, and charge a heckuva lot for 'em.
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #15 on: Mar 25th, 2005, 9:15pm »
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Since cost is a not a consideration, and I'm pretty lazy, I'll just sell him a tin pot for about 10 million bucks.
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #16 on: Jun 24th, 2005, 9:40pm »
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i would make the room very fancy, telling hit the price is twice what it really was, also make the toilet with a jet so he doesent need to wipe, he already has enough sh*t, no need for more. The door would not exist, the room is completly sealed in, as he doesent allow people to see inside his coding so goes to his bathroom. most of the stuff is brass, as he got a lot to show(if you could see it, but it has problems, and its not the greatest or value. I would have the EUA(End user Agreement) on the inside of the door, so you cant read it.
 
Also the room would periodicly collapse and have to reboot(rebuild) itself, at least 200 times a day if not more. um, and a bunch of other stuff.
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Voodoo
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #17 on: Aug 6th, 2005, 6:30am »
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“You may not speak to Bill.” – err, send him an email? Grin
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #18 on: Aug 6th, 2005, 7:55am »
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why not sms ?  Tongue
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diemert
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #19 on: Jun 17th, 2008, 5:31am »
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diamond ceiling
gold toilet
pearal sink
saphire toothbrush
emerald tub
ruby shower
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ChrisPBacon
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #20 on: Jun 20th, 2008, 12:28pm »
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i'd just use his money to buy myself a wadload of stuff  Tongue
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Arvind
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #21 on: Nov 12th, 2008, 11:26am »
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I would never accept such an assignment !!!
 
I want to work as  S/w developer , not as any bathroom designer,not even for Bill gates
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Grimbal
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #22 on: Nov 13th, 2008, 8:33am »
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It all depends how much he pays.
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howard roark
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #23 on: Nov 29th, 2008, 10:54am »
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Ya It all depends on how much the pay is for a position
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DigitalLinx
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Re: bill gates bathroom  
« Reply #24 on: Jan 8th, 2009, 5:23pm »
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Windows logo in his toilet is a must, and windows source code printed on his toilet paper Wink  
Windows style "Please wait Loading ..." on his boiler.
BSOD for mirrors, His tap water will take 3 minutes to run. That's about all the creative ideas I got so far.
« Last Edit: Jan 8th, 2009, 5:32pm by DigitalLinx » IP Logged
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